A place for critical reading, compelling writing, and analytical thinking.
Wednesday, September 13, 2017
A Tablemate—due December 14
Write 150+ kind, specific words about a tablemate's essay. Mention which essay you're complimenting. Quote at least two great sentences/phrases used by your tablemate. Include your tablemate's initials ("MC" for example).
89 comments:
Leonard
said...
The essay I will be complimenting is the causal essay written by one of my amazing tablemates. It is very detailed and well-thought out. I can tell that my tablemate put a lot of work and research into his essay. His hard work definitely paid off. He supported his opinions with valid, coherent thoughts and with reliable, scholarly sources. He also used different types of sentence structures that made his essay more enjoyable to read. One sentence that showed unique structure was “The overwhelming influence in our lives is growing by the day: technology is becoming more and more widely used and depended on.” I also like how he looked at both perspectives of some things. He stated that some people use technology to get noticed, while others “use the internet in order to be anonymous,” encompassing a larger range of people who use technology. He did a remarkable job of explaining why something is the way that it is, and that is not always an easy feat.
I will be complimenting my tablemate CW's causal essay about why teenagers sleep a lot. The whole essay is full of smart words and details about why students do not get all the sleep that they need. She also talks about how our brain is not fully ready for the school day until around 10 in the morning. If a student does not get all the sleep they need they could have medical problems that arise. She says, "In other cases, excessive daytime sleepiness can be a sign of other problems. Insomnia, depression, or narcolepsy—all are examples of medication side effects." I think it is important that she added these so students know how bad not getting enough sleep can be. She also states that 25.4% of our grade get less than 8 hours a night. That isn't good for our grade and could affect test scores and other grades dramatically. Overall, I think she did a really good job with making her essay original and making things unique.
I will be writing about my tablemate JK's compare-contrast essay on the similarities and differences between League of Legends and traditional sports. We actually worked on this essay together and I must say working with him was a pleasure. JK brings information from both sides of the spectrum, including vivid details and in-depth knowledge. JK is not a big sports guy, but he sure does love his esports. He was able to bring details of what traditional sports are like to him, a guy that does not watch sports regularly. "The traditional sports fan is seen as the most die-hard personality in modern cultures. Some fans even go to the extent of dressing up as their team mascot or their team name." JK was a great tablemate who brought great information to the table. So great we are in fact writing our argumentation essay together because the first time was too good to only create once. Expect great things from JK.
I will be complimenting KD’s classification essay. Her essay classifies the many different types of students in high school. KD put a lot of thought into her essay and speaks the truth about her topic. She makes the point that “parents are some of the most influential people in a child’s life…” and that their actions as they grow could be caused by how they were raised. She also makes sure to take some of the blame off the parents and put it solely on the student themselves. Some parents do everything correctly, but their child still chooses to disregard them and rebel. I also really loved KD’s paragraph about the “mundane” students. She doesn’t make being average seem bad or boring. She makes it known that they, while being considered average, are still very important to the school. She even states that they are “the type of students that would make phenomenal extras in every high school movie ever made.” While the average people don’t excel at everything, they simply go with the flow. They might be passionate and excel in activities outside of school. A school is simply a place for them to learn. Overall I think KD did an amazing job with writing her essay. It is unique, truthful, and well thought out.
I will be complimenting my table mate ML’s causal essay about caring for hair. This essay is very interesting for the reason that has is a huge part of our lives and hair is associated with social norms and a person's identity/status. She explained how hair is a stereotype with female having long hair while males have short hair. ML’s states “since the start of this phenomenon [hair length as a source of identity], hair lengths especially embedded itself as a gender identity.” I agree with this statement because our society associates long hair with a female. Throughout the whole essay she ties in history with the present and how society has changed their views on hair. Another point of interest in the essay was in the past women were expected to be inside the house, doing house chores, while the men would be out in the public and workforce. “Long hair generally shows that you do not do much strenuous work.” She incorporates many vocab words and work cited with history and facts about hair that I never knew before, making this an interesting and informative essay.
EH’s comparison-contrast essay is phenomenal. It compares Mondays to Fridays and EH does a wonderful job of expounding on that. She compares Mondays to storms and Fridays to rainbows. She does a masterful job of bending conventional grammar and writing rules. She writes in third person, but her personality most definitely shows itself throughout the essay. When she writes about Monday, I can relate to everything she says. It seems she is speaking to me. And when she lets the reader know that she is writing the essay on a Monday, the empathy is practically tangible. She sees the sad tidings that Mondays bring and laments with the rest of humanity. Her description of Fridays is also very accurate. There is nothing quite like the feeling of relief and rest on a Friday. EH sees that and displays the same joy in her writing. I was most impressed with her way of comparing the two. She says they both symbolize a fresh start, which is true. She closes with a cute quip about singing in the rain.
I will be complimenting my table-mate GA’s masterful comparison-contrast essay. She decided to examine the differences between that of softball and baseball. Not only did she give multiple differences to the sports but also gave ethical understandings to those who are not familiar with the lifestyles such as “you hear someone asking a girl if they play baseball. BIG mistake!” What is so fascinating about this essay is not just the content, but how it is written. I found myself to want to continue to read and discover more differences when I personally do not have any inclination to read about softball/baseball. But her essay changed that as I never felt board but instead enlightened about the differences I never picked up on. What I also enjoyed is how it was written. She found a way to make the words flow together making her as the author sound intelligent and very well educated on the subject. If I was unaware of who she was I still would have believed every word she said with utmost truth. Her verbiage as well as fascinating as to how she could so easily transition a sentences or topic with a “however” or a simple comma. It is truly magnificent phrasing as to which I applaud her! My favorite was how she used the requirements of the essay (vocab words, final exam terms…) to embellish her essay instead of just throwing it in for the grade. She really spent time figuring out how to use these to her advantage and make the essay truly another level. An example of where she used a final exam term to clarify is “catcher (who is in charge of the defense).” Which added to the essay instead of seeming as tho unneeded. I personally enjoy this essay and recommend it to anyone seeking an example.
I will be complimenting my tablemate KT’s comparison-contrast essay. This essay compares and contrasts who you are on the outside versus who you really are on the inside. In her essay, she states, “Looking back into the person inside you, one will find the demeanor change into something considerably calmer when they turn into their maskless counterparts”. I believe this expresses much more than our brain can fathom. I like that she puts so much thought into creating this essay to make the reader feel what she is trying to say. Also in her essay, she says, “The kid who walked down the hallway saying “hi” to everyone may go home and cry due to depression. Maybe the girl you sit next to in biology had a family emergency and cannot wait to be alone and just sit”. While many people do not realize these things go on around them, this essay really makes you wonder how your peers or even your friends are feeling on the inside. I like that she put the concept of a person wearing a mask. Most people think of a mask as part of a costume to wear for fun, but others wear a mask because they do not want to share their feelings or flaws. I think she put great effort and enthusiasm into her essay.
I will be commenting on AS'scausal essay. This essay talks about fashion trends among teenagers. I like this topic because is it something that I have a lot of interest in. I love how she starts off the essay, "From off the shoulder tops to joggers to destroyed denim to Chuck Taylors, fashion trends are ubiquitous." This really grabs your attention at first. It really explains well what she is about to start talking about and what kind of outfits are popular today. I also really like how she points out how if one girl wears something to school one day, most girls will realize how cute that outfit is and start doing the same thing. It is being a trendsetter, "Down the hall walks a confident girl wearing a style of shirt no one has seen before that day." Avery has wonderful grammar usage throughout the whole essay. It was very easy to read and relate to. I can tell Avery put a lot of effort into this essay because of the flow of it and the display of knowledge it has.
The essay I will be complimenting was written by one of my very enjoyable table mates. It was filled with passion and creativity. The essay I am complimenting was actually the letters written at the beginning of the semester. My table partner TN wrote to Dan Green a person he looks up to. His letter, as I mentioned before, is filled with passion. He is obviously very passionate about what he does and just happens to share this passion with the person he writes about. He wrote to the person he looks up to with the perfect combination of ethos, pathos, and logos. This not only renders the letter smart and effective but also adds a very personal touch to something that is obviously near and dear to his heart. The letter was obviously not only effective for those who know TN but also to Dan Green himself. Dan Green responded to him and was clearly touched by his effective use of ethos, pathos, and logos enough to take time out of his day to respond to TN, a simple fan of his. Stengel
RN’s classification essay which classifies medical field students is interesting and entertaining to read. With her use of hypothetical situations and clear organization, RN succeeds at simultaneously informing and entertaining her audience. One of the most relatable situations RN writes about involves medical field students who are more or less pushed into the field by their parents. “He brings home his laundry every weekend just so he can spend time with his parents talking about why they chose this route for him,” this hypothetical situation presented by RN is well-written and is one that I think everyone can match someone to. She also employs various types of sentence structures and strong, compelling word choice. The following sentence demonstrates RN’s excellent use of writing with a variety of sentence starters: “Thrill, excitement, and stress go hand in hand when working with patients.” RN clearly put forth a great amount of effort into her essay, and her dedication shows in her final product.
I am complimenting my tablemate HJ's essay over classifying different types of sports fans. She classifies the sports fans as the fanatic, the feeble, the forced, the facile, and the fool. One of the sentences that I agree tremendously with on HJ's essay is, "The definition of a bandwagon is someone who has never liked the team before, but once they do something phenomenal they fall for the team and start to like them and pay attention to how well they are doing." I agree 100% with this because bandwagons only like that certain team if they are good. I agree with her and think that if you are a true fan then you follow this team, have attire for that team, watch the games, and even go to some games. Another sentence that I strongly agree with is, "The Fanatics are the ones who watch their team while their children are being born, or miss a holiday with their family because their team is playing that day or some choose to not even be around other people while watching the game." This type of fan is the absolute opposite than the bandwagon. These fans are the true fans and I believe the HJ is a true fan of the Green Bay Packers.
I will be talking about my stablemate JT's classification essay. This essay is simply superb, with colorful details and insigthful thoughts throughout. One of my favorite things about this essay is how she classifies something so mundane: the shoppers at Hyvee. We have all been a shopper at a supermarket, so we can all see ourselves as a certain type of shopper; or, depending on our mood, we can see ourselves as all of these shoppers. I also love how colorful and detailed her descriptions of shoppers and Hyvee is. I love how she compares Hyvee to a jungle, and then uses language that conveys how it is akin to the canopy by making us feel that we are in the canopy. Overall, the essay is a stupendous piece of work and I am so glad that I got to read and be apart of the truly impeccable piece of writing that it is.
I am commenting on my table mate CA’s noteworthy classification essay. CA’s essay classifies the types of customers a coffee shop barista experiences within a day. It is very well structured with intense descriptions to really put you in the position of the barista. With the use of imagery and some sarcasm, it is easy to pick up these clues. Every customer she explains has their own type of feeling from the barista attached to it, adding a little bit of spunk and humor within the essay. Many beautifully written sentences are included within her essays but the two sentences I found the best included stellar descriptions and many uses of different final exam terms. One of the sentences I truly appreciated was one with interesting imagery, “With a continuous flow of fruitacious flavor on your taste buds, your mind is at peace.” this sentence really painted the picture for me and made me feel calm. The second sentence I felt was quite masterful was one that said: “They are the nice, easy-going kid—the type you want to watch your pets.” I liked comparison within this sentence and found the use of dashes key to its structure. Overall, CA ended with a publish-worthy essay that I think many coffee shop customers would find comical.
SS's causal essay is relatable and truthful. I enjoyed the first body paragraph when SS began writing about how to be comfortable around another person and not bombard them with mind-boggling information. Although some of the information is common sense, the majority of the essay is extremely informative and helpful when speaking about approachability. One sentence that sticks out to me says, "If you don’t want to be approachable, get a sleeve filled with tattoos, some piercings in the body, some scary skull rings, and a really dark shade of theme going and you will be as unapproachable as that one bartender who lives in Corson and only works nights." SS did a great job in creating imagery and captivating the readers by using something they are familiar with (bartender in Corson). Later in the essay, Sam also states, "it is always good to try new things." The following sentence is simple, but it means so much. SS successfully caught the reader's attention by applying short and sweet sentences to his essay that allow the reader to think critically about them. Overall, SS did a great job on the essay and made it relatable to everyone.
I will be complimenting KP's well thought out argumentation essay. KP's interesting essay is over why books should not be banned from school. "Children should have a choice on what information and stories they want to read." KP obviously cares about kids getting to read what they want and for certain books not to be banned. KP makes extremely clear points that are very well written. The essay keeps the reader interested throughout the whole thing and is very enjoyable to read. "They neglect to look at the book as a whole and ignorantly focus one, often minute, detail." is an example of some clearcut points KP makes throughout her whole essay, that allow readers to look at the situation in a new, different way. KP really did put in a lot of effort to make it so the reader themselves can understand the problem and why things need to change. I think anyone would enjoy reading KP's essay.
I will be complimenting my tablemate RL’s classification essay. In her essay, she classifies cheerleaders into four different groups: the Charlatan, the Ignominy, the Tyro, and the Pro. I can tell she worked very hard on this essay and I like that she started out her introduction paragraph with a statistic about cheerleaders to really grab the attention of the reader. Her vocabulary is impressive, yet understandable. She uses many different sentence structures in order to keep her essay away from predictability. One sentence that really stuck out to me was “If Ignominious are guilt, then Tyros are innocence.”. I like the way she contrasted them while using only one sentence. She kept it simple, yet she still told the reader how they are different. Another sentence that I enjoyed was “Tyros are attracted to the idea of becoming a Charlatan because they see all the attention and love that is thrown at them, this leads to the creation of more and more Charlatans—further deteriorating the image of all cheerleaders.”. I think the structure is well put together and she made good use of a dash. Overall, her essay was great and well thought-out. I can tell she really worked hard on this essay.
I had the privilege of reading through KF's essay entitled "The Dog Ate This Title… :Why People Procrastinate". A causal essay, she explains the causes of procrastination in fine detail, only adding to the completeness of the essay with the creative title. She adds to her proof on the causes of procrastination by adding quotes and ideas from a highly credible researcher, Flett, and by using ideas of perfectionists—those who try to accomplish everything with 110% effort. Her use of perfectionists who procrastinate adds an easy-to-understand example and a point of reference for the readers. She states "If they can not achieve their goals, then neither they nor their task reach perfection." I find this sentence particularly intriguing and enjoy the way it brings sense to her statements. She also adds information about an interesting study done which confirms that people think "The person they are today and the person they will become are separate entities." It shows that her argument that fear is a factor in procrastination, as people are fearful of what they will become and how they will become that person. They push it off because they do not understand how the transition between their current self and future self will mesh. I believe this point is powerful and that KF did an amazing job showing points that normally would not have been thought of.
The causal essay neatly wrote by the man himself, Max Wilder, is an intense conspiracy. This extensive essay breaks down what turns someone into a complete psychopath. It is a very detailed essay that gives you the ability to think when you read the essay. One amazing quote I love from the essay reads, "Psychopathy has been around for thousands of years, lurking beneath the normal mask that people wear." It is crazy to think that some people that are psychopaths think they are completely normal but knowing on the inside they have completely different thoughts lurk around their head. People that murder probably murder because they are completely crazy people that are clueless to know that they are crazy so the absurd thoughts that they give to themselves could seem completely normal to the psychopath. Another good quote reads, 'There are a million factors that could contribute to the cause of psychopaths, but childhood development is always a recurring idea that comes up in discussions." I just like how he includes something to think about just about every sentenced that he typed.
I was able to read the essay of KG, a beautiful essay it is. The topic of money and happiness has always been of interest to me, and I was intrigued from the very start of this essay. I happen to agree with her side of this topic, which made me more persuaded to read it. The essay begins with the true happiness is, by definition anyway. Eventually, the mention of friends and family comes up. With that being said, this quote stuck out to me, "Through jealousy and envy, people have forgotten what makes them happiest: friends and family." I found this to be shockingly true. I realized that people are so caught up in the idea of having a good job and making a good amount of money, that often friends and family, the initial happiness, are pushed aside. KG also mentions that happiness can come from the things you love, like hobbies. This brings me to her next quote, “‘Studies have also shown that cancer survivors do better related to recovery and remission when utilizing hobbies to increase their well-being’” Even in the darkest time of a person's life, there can still be happiness through the things they love, without money. I think that KG's essay is coming together beautifully.
One of my tablemate’s, BT, has written a great essay. In the essay, her and her partners have argued valid points and it is very well organized. My favorite part is the beginning, “Think of every single time you have worked hard for something you strive to achieve; spending hours on end trying to make things as perfect as possible, stressing over an audition or a test that will mean nothing in a week, yet feeling overpowered with joy when you finally accomplish the task at hand.” This sentence is such an attention getter and right away at the beginning of the essay the audience is involved. I loved how it says “think of” because when someone is reading it they will actually think of a time in their life and understand what BT is trying to say. “With hard work comes great reward and a high amount of success.” In my opinion, this sentence is very powerful. It is not very long but it is right to the point. There is a lot of meaning in that sentence. I enjoyed reading this essay. Great job BT!
I have read AF’s Comparison-contrast essay. The start to the essay was beautiful. She opened by telling a story about winning a race. She opened her essay with the sentence, “Motors roaring, wheels spinning, and green flag waving, the start of the race has begun.” The way she told the story was phenomenal as far as imagery goes. I was able to actually imagine a slow motion race that led the driver to the checkered flag. Being a person who knows nothing about cars and racing, I can tell that she is very passionate about what she is talking about and that she is also very knowledgeable on the subject she has chosen. One thing I learned while reading through this essay is, “Sprint cars have four overt wheels and they do not have fenders.” Reading through the essay gave me keen insight on the differences between the two cars she has chosen and what makes each of these cars unique. She used complicated final exam terms to make her essay wonderful. Being knowledgeable in the subject, helped her write far past the requirement for pages which is very impressive. Overall, I think AF’s essay was beautifully written to perfection.
Today, I have the honor to read CM’s classification essay. I was delightfully surprised by this essay; it encased the perfect amount of thought, humor, and honesty. The author classified the different ways people deal with a break up. From binge eating to obsessing, there is a category for everyone. Each classification was perfectly thought out. What I really appreciated was that each class was not just described, but tips on how to deal with these classes were given. The author gave insightful information for people to help their friends that are going through a breakup. Once particular example that I think can be applicable in almost any situation is “friends always needs to be there to help their friends get through rough times”. CM did a great job of including a class for everyone and most importantly, how to help these sorrowful people. In closing, CM was very insightful when she mentioned that people can fall into more than one class. Along with that, it is imperative to be aware of the classes so that one can help their friends in the best way possible. CM said it best when she said that “this thing we call life comes with exhilarations, struggles, celebrations, and sorrow. No one wants to go through the hardships alone”. In addition, breakup classes of people are not only applicable in breakup situations. CM’s classifications can be used to help people dealing with other hardships of life including “the loss of a pet, job, or significant other”. This essay was amazing. It provided insight in how to help people deal with hardships. With the perfect balance of humor, seriousness, and insight, CM did a great job with the classification essay.
I read GK’s comparison essay. His essay starts off very nicely. He is talking about being on a beach and he makes it sound so soothing and calm with, “ The warm sun shining down is giving you the comforting feeling of safety as you lie on the beach without a care in the world.” I love his first paragraph it is worded so well. He wrote it so well it makes you want to keep reading, unlike some poorly written essays. I feel like I am the person walking on the beach. It is very advanced writing. He then goes on saying that he is comparing living real life versus comparing living a dream. He talks in the next paragraph is the goals people have, “Contrary to the concept of having blank pages waiting for the fresh ink of new ideas and goals, some already have outlandish goals that seem completely unachievable.” Saying some people are waiting for their goal and some people have huge goals. His essay was very interesting and fun to read about life and dreams.
I read LV's causal essay about why and how people imagine dreams. To begin, her essay comes off in a very fluid structure. She has a great introduction that gets the reader more involved by asking the question "What did you dream about last night?". This question makes you think and makes you want to learn more. I like how she questions what dreaming is rather than just believing what the experts say. She looks deep into the subject. Another quote that was very good and interesting was from the survey she did on the class. This quote was how "An overwhelming one hundred percent of the sixty-two students responded that their dreams were in images; while only thirty students experience sound and only four report text". I thought that this was interesting because all of the surveyed students found that they saw images in their dreams. Overall, i enjoyed the layout and great information that LV gave throughout her essay on dreams.
I will be complimenting my tablemate MH's causal essay as to why professional athlete's careers end. I chose this essay because I enjoy sports and think it is interesting to read why players stop playing. In his introductory paragraph, he states, "Dating back to the Greece Olympiad, if someone has a particular talent in a sport, they are put upon a pedestal in society." I think this a good way to capture the reader's attention and really get them thinking about how popular athletes are. He gives three reasons as to why professional athletes walk away from the game and builds off of those well in his essay. I like the sentence in his conclusion where he says, "As the popularity of sports in global culture continues to grow and advance, there will always be a necessity for athletes who accel at their craft and a line of athletes who wish to showcase their skill on the professional level." This statement shows truly how big sports are in our world today. There are so many levels of athletics and so many players that want to make it to the professional level. Overall, MH did a very nice job writing this essay and showed that he put a lot of time into finding out why professional athletes leave their sports.
I will be complementing Sydney’s Classification Essay (SN). First off, the title is spectacular, with a great rhyme that tells three different types of people who drive cars. Not only is it amusing, it is specific and to the point about the types. I also like how in her intro paragraph details the importance and responsibility of having a driver’s license. It says “A driver’s license comes with both a supremely high horizon of responsibility as well as an entirely new level of freedom.” This phrase is well thought out and uses alliteration particularly well with “high horizon.” Another phrase I am particularly fond of is “Almost always in a hurry, the Swearing are extremely obnoxious, invidious, and rude. Their windows are usually down, in case of needing to yell swear words at any given moment.” Again, not only is it highly amusing, it details a type and classification of drivers that swear and are obnoxious on the road.
I had the pleasure of reading JT’s classification essay on different types of shoppers at HyVee. In her essay, she used a metaphor to compare the different types of shoppers to various animals in the jungle. As a whole, I found the essay very enjoyable, yet enlightening at the same time. She had an amazing use of imagery, that made the situations described, both in the store and the jungle, come to life. One example of her excellent imagery was when she wrote, “towering shelves around the store, forming a canopy of canned goods and providing the customers with everything they’ve ever wanted.” I loved how this sentence led me to imagine my local HyVee, while simultaneously connecting her metaphor to reality in my head. Not only did JT use imagery very well, she was also tied humor into her essay very well. I found myself chuckling at various parts, and it made the whole essay an entertaining read. At one point, I couldn’t stop myself from grinning when she said, “If the Gorilla is slightly nudged or triggered in any way by another customer, a prayer had better be said.” I thoroughly took pleasure in reading JT's essay and had a great time deciphering which type of animal I am when I shop.
I am complementing EC's Classification essay. Her essay was very beautiful and thought out. She classified people as parts of trees. She classified people into three categories: Roots, Branches, and Leaves. The Roots are the people who are there to support you in any circumstances. The Branches are the people you may not have a deep relationship with, but they still leave an impact on your. Finally, the leaves, are the people who drift in and out of your life depending on the season of life you are in. She displayed a great understanding of people and our relationship to those around us. She had many examples. She painted with her writing. She included many similes This was good because it gave life, interest, personality, and visual to her writing. At one point she talks about the Branches as the random people you meet around you. These brief encounters with these random people do something beneficial for you. She says, “When you see this person it reminds you to slow down your day, have a good attitude, and remember that you are blessed.” This is a great sentence because she is trying to be a Branch in the essay. She is doing what the people do in the essay. The people unknowingly encourage you, and she unknowingly encourages the reader and gives the reader a good reminder about life and the blessings in it. My favorite sentence in her essay is towards the end, when she says, “The job at hand is to determine how you will let the people around you influence you.” This is the high moment in the essay. This is her point, and it is a powerful point. Throughout her essay she taught many simple life lessons in a graceful way.
The essay I will be complimenting is my tablemates Classification topic. FK’s Classification essay is about the different kinds of roommates you could have during college. I love this essay so much because everything she says is true. She has three different categories including the Slovenly, Systematic, and the Sidekick. The Slovenly person is the roommate that always seems to create a mess. Within FK’s essay she says, “Trash is laying all over the floor, clothes are scattered about, homework is scattered across the bed, and a faint, disgusting smell lingers that you wish was not there”. There is also the Systematic roomate. I feel like I would be this kind of roommate because I love to stay organized. My favorite part of her essay is this line, “... papers are scattered about the bed and even though you know exactly what you are doing, the OCD freak is having a meltdown and keeps cleaning up the papers and complaining”. FK’s essay made me laugh and ponder what type of roommate I will have the pleasure of meeting come the move in day.
I read my tablemate AP compare-contrast essay. This essay was about different time periods of art, specifically Renaissance and baroque. AP did a good job with text painting, she gave reasons why the different paintings are from the different time, the descriptions she gave we strong enough to make the reader visualize the different paintings. One of the sentences she said was, "Baroque art has motion and is displayed throughout the painting to draw the beholder’s eye in and follow the motion within the picture." This was one of the sentences that gave me a strong description. Another wonderful part of the essay was she gave credit to both time periods for creating wonderful art although they are very different. Here is an example, In Europe, Renaissance and Baroque art is displayed throughout the museums and churches today showing off the true beauty of these artifacts from the time period."
I read through my tablemate, HH, casual essay. This essay was about the different obstacles people face when going through depression and why people experience it. Learning that there was a difference “between blues and depression”, as she put it, made you truly understand that depression can sometimes be a more chronic obstacle that people deal with on a day to day basis, as opposed to just being sad and then moving on the next day. Her essay made good points and showed readers the true facts behind depression. I learned that there is more to depression than just feeling sad. She brought research to the table and really went above and beyond with her essay. I could tell she put a lot of hard work and effort into this essay and you most definitely could tell by reading it. One of the sentence structures that was most unique was “Furthermore, a great impact on how one gets depression over one who does not is affected by what the individual blamed for failures”. It added good sentence rhythm as well as bringing a solid point to the essay.
I am complimenting FG’s comparison-contrast essay about the similarities and differences between having siblings and not having any. Right away, in the beginning paragraph of the essay, she does a great job at hooking the audience into reading her essay. Then, as you work your way down the essay, it is noticeable at how well the paragraphs flow from one to another. It is as if the paragraph never really ended. The essay also got me to feel connected to it because of how well it describes the lives of those with and without siblings. In the first paragraph, when she said, “When you have an older or younger sibling you automatically have to be able to interact with one another daily whether you like it or not”, it got me really thinking about my relationship with my little sister. Most days I am perfectly willing to interact with her but on the days when I don’t want to I can struggle a lot. I still have to interact with her, but working on that now will help me later when I have a job and need to interact with co-workers everyday. The other part of the essay I felt connected to was when she said, “The only child will typically take charge because they are used to having the process of things go according to how they see fit in their head.” Even though I have a sibling I can still relate to being an only child because my sister is 4 years younger than me and doesn’t share many similar interests with me. This has pushed me to work through challenges on my own and has helped me take charge in doing and enjoying things by myself, a trait more closely related to someone without siblings than someone with them. Creating an atmosphere that lets me reminisce about these things is something hard to do, and with her essay being able create that atmosphere, I think that it is safe to say that her essay is a spectacular one.
I read my table partner KT’s classification essay. This essay was particularly fun to read because of how unique it is. I immediately appreciated the fact that it was about different types of pirates. I was excited to read about it, and the essay did not disappoint. She layered in colorful and creative language throughout her essay. It made me remember my childhood, and watching cartoons like Spongebob and movies like Peter Pan. In the second paragraph, she said, “To become the perfect pirate as a child all that is need is an eye patch, a skull and crossbones shirt, a hat, and the incredibly important sword while asking everyone if they have seen their booty just like the pirates on screen.” Another aspect of her essay I appreciated, was that she had real facts about actual pirates. I was able to reminisce about my childhood, while also learning. I particularly like this sentence: “One of the most common diseases associated with sea rovers is scurvy, or the severe lack of vitamin C.” Overall, I had fun reading this essay, and liked that it had a fresh topic.
I read my tablemate VH's causal essay. I was immediately pulled into the essay by the phrase: "Do you feel some nights that falling asleep seems like a never-ending possibility?". Her essay was organized masterfully, and all of her points were fully thought out. I also appreciated that while talking about the science of yawning, she didn't just only write theories, she also used facts and surveys to confirm her points. She took sources from books, magazines, and scientists, proving that she is very informed on her topic. Her survey concluded, "about 68 percent of students say the main reason that they yawn is because they are tired, 70 percent of students say that they yawn because they are bored, and 10 percent of students say that they yawn because they see someone else yawn". I really enjoyed that she mixed scientific facts with interesting theories and ideas to create an original and informative essay.
I will be complementing RV's Comparison contrast essay. In this essay, he juxtaposed rap and country music, two things that are completely different. While there are obvious differences, he went further into depth by pointing out things that most would not even think about. For example, he wrote about the different attire each musician wears, and even what their goal while making music is. Not to mention, he used impeccable grammar, funny wits, and extensive word choice. Reading his essay helped me to decide what kind of music I was interested in by explaining music. Another thing I really enjoyed about this essay was the aspect of passion. It is clear that he is very passionate about music, and it was shown beautifully in his essay. This essay truly goes above and beyond to not only contrast music types, but also to bring people together through two opposite genres. RV wrote this essay with excellence and effort, and in the end he produced a wonderful essay that I very much enjoyed reading.
I had the privilege of reading JL’s classification essay. Right off the bat, I felt compelled and wanted to read more. JL did a fantastic job with his intro paragraph and making sure the reader related to the situation; I know I did! As he is talking about completing a jigsaw puzzle, one line in his intro paragraph I found to be truly relatable to readers was, “All you can do now is assume that the missing piece was swallowed by a pet, sucked up by a vacuum cleaner to be disposed of, or simply dropped through a portal into another dimension never to be seen again.” This is so incredibly true. The readers immediately want to keep reading because they relate. JL’s essay flows smoothly and his analogy of a band relating to a puzzle makes perfect sense. Later in the essay, JL states, “When one starts to put together a jigsaw puzzle, he or she typically attempts to find all the outside edge pieces first. Similar to the formation of a band, establishing a puzzle is much less complicated when you have a good base.” This paragraph transition is easy for the readers and is relational to his intro paragraph. Again, the analogy is perfect for describing and classifying parts of a band. JL has a stellar essay.
I was honored to read EG's narration essay. Her essay was very compelling in terms of the way she explained her setting. Her detailed explanation of the setting was enough to give me a visual of every word she spoke. One line in particular, though a fragment, I caught was when she said, "The rebellious tree." Though it was a fragment and held no true connotation, it spoke volumes about the severity of the situation present in the essay. After the storm in her story had finished, she explained the aftermath in grotesque detail, as if I were there too. One of her lines she explains when she looks around at the destruction of the storm, "Many of the photos my parents had displayed of me around the house were either blown away into what might as well have been oblivion or they were completely destroyed." EG's essay really worked out well, her writing very exact and virtually flawless. She definitely knows how to convey a good story. EG's essay is amazing.
I read my tablemate Hannah Hendricks scholarship essays. I thought that she incorporated many qualities that helped increase the value of the essays. First off I noticed that she covered every aspect of the questions and answered them very well. She talks about eating gluten-free foods in on of her essays and her struggles that pursued. The most interesting thing was how she says that she is unable to eat wheat, rye, and barley. She adds that "this protein hinders digestion in the small intestines in Celiac patients". This is neat because she gives insight into how it personally affected her and how she later had to deal with it. Some struggles that she dealt with were sacrificing foods that she loved. Luckily, she explains that Hyvee helped her with these struggles. Adding how helpful they were and how much they care for their customers. Overall, I think that she had a stellar essay and is definitely a contender for receiving the scholarship.
I very much enjoyed reading BC's compare-contrast essay. Her passion for comics, both Watchman and Justice League, comes through in her intense writing saying the comics help others "indulge in the fantasy world of these heroes." Knowing nothing about either of these beforehand, I feel much more educated on the topic. Although she loves what she is writing about, she did not shy away from critizisms of either world. She even critized the excessing movies made by Justice league, saying "these stragems are cheap moves". Her writing captured me as an audience and made me want to read the comics for the first time. I have read a few of BC's essays and they seem to create interest where none exists before.
My tablemate, EB, has many great aspects to her essays. One that I paid particular attention to was her Classification Essay. She made a great use of an analogy throughout her entire essay. EB related the different types of students to bowling, including a Straight Ball, a Curve Ball, and a Gutter Ball. I feel that this was a great way to compare students to something that she is truly passionate about. One line that I found particularly interesting was when she said "The only way to avoid these clashes is to teach about these classifications and inform students about how to deal with different personality types". I liked this line because it related her essay to real-world problems that her essay can help to solve. Another line I liked was when she said "Their interpretation of the directions shows how each child -Straight, Curve, and Gutter-is a separate individual, and all require a different degree of attention to be able to learn properly and get the most out of their schooling". I really liked this line because it effectively brings up a large social issue that not everyone is exactly the same as the person sitting next to them. EB's essay was a very powerful message that was well delivered and got the points that se wanted to get across.
I really liked KD's compare-contrast essay. I love how she was able to compare childhood and adulthood, which are two very different things. "Each age group learns so much about life by simply interacting with each other." This is true in many ways because the kids learn how to live their lives by watching and learning from their parents. The kids, on the other hand, teach the adults. They teach them maturity and the parents become a lot wiser when they have kids. "Once an adult comes home, they must run an entire house and keep things under control." This contrast is great because it also shows how much different the two groups are. Children must obey their elders, and eventually, they will become the older and wiser people, and then they will run the house. KD did a great job with this essay and I really enjoyed reading it.
Of the great composers of my corner table in the room, I have decided upon reading an essay written by the astute Ally Boerhave. She has written quite a remarkable comparison-contrast essay detailing the similarities and differences between a pair of the world’s most influential genres of music: jazz and classical music. AB has shown extensive knowledge of the musical styles. She explains the different time signatures used in classical music by showing how to count them out; for example, “⅞ (counted like 1,2 1,2 123)”. Many musically-declined people would have no clue how to count out in ⅞, but she makes sure the detail is getting across. In addition to the explanation of some of the theory behind the music, she also brings up defining characteristics about the different styles that even some musicians do not consider, like the setting in which the music is played: “Because of the beauty and grace classical music carries, a supporting venue that will increase the emotion and purpose of the piece is just as important as the song itself.” Ally is a terrific writer, and I know she will continue to write many more masterpieces.
The essay that I read helped me realize the differences between linemen and wide receivers. I am not an avid Sunday football watching type of gal. In reading BL's "Football's Best: A Juxtaposition of Offensive Linemen and Wide Receivers" essay, I enhanced my ability to be able to completely different roles these football players have. A variety of slang words are used in the game including "bigs" (linemen) and "quicks" (wide receivers). The essay showed BL's passion and awareness for football. I enjoyed learning about football from the perspective of a player.
I read my tablemate KG's classification essay. KG's essay was focused on our school's homecoming. She talked about the uninterested, bashful, miserable, and extreme people. I liked how she talked about how we do things at Brandon Valley High School to make it more relatable. Homecoming week is a time that so many students look forward to every year." I like how she mentioned how she felt about homecoming so everyone knows how she feels about it. It is nice to read an essay you can agree with. You can tell that she put a lot of work in her essay. Her side comments make her essay very organized. As you are reading this essay and thinking, “What type of homecoming student am I?”. She really allows the audience to engage in her essay. I really enjoyed reading her essay and learn about how she classified our Brandon Valley Homecoming.
I read CV's essay about classifying the different types of fans at a football game. While reading this essay I noticed many aspects of it that were fun to see. One of these aspects would be the way the vocab words made sense in all the sentences that she used. An example of this would be "If you end up sitting by the Vain they might encourage you to not cheer or eschew you if you do". Sometimes when students attempt to put vocab words into their essays it results in their sentences not making much sense. But as you can see this is not the case with CV's essay. Another aspect I like about her essay is that she has good introductions into her paragraphs. One of my favorites is the beginning of her third paragraph, "Woohoo! Yelling, jumping, dancing, and singing- these actions all mean "cheering" to the Insane". I liked this introduction because it is fun and helps you visualize how the Insane act.
The argumentation essay I will be complimenting is the essay written by my table mate, Varonica Heinrichs. Our essays are debating whether or not first impressions are of high importance. VH's essay is quite detailed and comprehendible. VH writes passionately while also maintaining a level of professionalism, making the piece easy to follow along with. Her sentences flow well but include scholarly words. One thing I thought made her essay stand out was her idea to incorporate a student survey into her research and use it in her essay. This factor provided an excellent reference to understand her data. Another detail I thought was interesting was her use of the phrase "... we as humans still judge other people because it is in our nature..." This sentence helped me find a way to relate to her standpoint because she was right, every person judges others. VH made an excellent point when she stated, "The interviewer will notice seven things first: your arrival time, what you are wearing, your body language, your communication style, if you are prepared or not, whether you seem excited to be there or not, and then finally if you have the qualifications or not." I genuinely enjoyed reading her essay and I am excited to see how our essays compare and contrast.
I will be complimenting my tablemate GB’s classification essay. In her essay, she compares the four different types of friends, The Pen Pals, The Weekday Friends, The Squad, and The Plastics. After reading her essay I could tell that she had put a lot of time and effort into it. GB incorporated many of our new vocab words and final exam terms in ways that all made sense. For each friend type GB describes both the pros and cons of having them. In her first paragraph, she states that “each friendship has its own uniqueness…” and that is what makes them special to what type of friend they are. I also really loved GB’s paragraph about The Squad. She gives great examples to help describe this type of friend. GB states, “At times it may seem like they know you almost better than you know yourself”. I enjoyed reading GB’s essay, she made it very relatable and fun.
Argumentative Essay written by VH. Her essay is being written about the importance of first impressions. Her argument that first impressions are extremely important holds much value. Through her essay she brings up good points, such as her points detailing the importance of first impressions in interviews. In her words, “The interviewer will notice seven things first: your arrival time, what you are wearing, your body language, your communication style, if you are prepared or not, whether you seem excited to be there or not, and then finally if you have the qualifications or not.” Another point of hers is that body language is very important. She says that “Another important factor is what this person’s body language is conveying and sometimes body language can be more powerful than speaking to a person.” These quotes show that she has done research about her subject and has a good understanding of what is going on in her essay.
I read JD’s classification essay. His essay was about five different kinds of skiers. I enjoyed reading this essay because there was some very interesting points. While reading his essay I could tell his passion and love for skiing and I could also tell he spends a lot of his time skiing during the winter season. I like how he gives great details about each kind of skier. For example, “These skiers can typically be identified by their shaky stance, the obviously farm worn or intended-for-hunting jackets and coveralls they wear, and their quivering transition from turn to turn.” and “Skiers who fit into the show can be found all over the mountain, but most often are located in the terrain park because this is the best place to showboat.” I think JD did an amazing job overall with this essay. He did a great job incorporating the final terms, vocabulary words, and grammatical classification sentences.
In LVR's comparison and contrast essay, it discusses the differences between books and movies and which are more appealing to you. The essay starts off with stating facts, adding credibility, and logic to get the readers attention. LVR states "Beginning as long ago as 3500 B.C, forms of books have been unceasingly popular and have not lost their meaning or practicality. Some people are still loyal to books; but many have turned to movies for entertainment and many thoroughly enjoy both". I think that this was a great way to begin this essay because it grabs my attention right away. She talks about how books contain a lot more intricate detail and tend to be lengthy because the author needs to be able to covey the story. Also, they do not have a specific time frame to tell the story. On the other hand, movies are sometimes the preferred option because even though movies are still intricate they have a time frame that the story needs to be told. Overall, I believe that this essay was very well constructed and is a great masterpiece!
The essay that I chose to read really helped me understand why there are a lot of people who do not do well in college and ultimately drop out. I never understood why someone would drop out of college, mostly because they have already paid a good amount of money and effort to attend college even if it is for just one semester. While reading SN's "Failing, Wailing, and Derailing: Why Students are Unsuccessful in College" she wrote, "students fail in college because they lack focus, motivation, and faith in themselves". This really hit home for me, mostly because I know that if you are to be successful in anything in life, you have to have faith in yourself and be very motivated. Another great quote I came across in my fellow tablemate's essay was “...students who attend institutions of higher education obtain a wide range of personal financial, and other lifelong benefits”. This is a very true statement that I think a lot of people who choose to not further their education miss.
MH's essay about spring and fall is a beautiful juxtaposition of "sister seasons". One of the things she states in her essay is "countless people look forward to the enjoyable seasonal experiences, which happen to only usually be available during that given time each year. Perhaps it is just the looming of heavenly aromas, the manifesting of piquant flavors, or the arrival of various types of activities that occur amid these seasons." This quote helps me think back to the seasons and brings back memories of friends, families, and food. The strong nouns, adjectives, and verbs really make her essay a masterpiece. The line that says "the first mowing of the lawn and the fresh wif that your nose picks up is a meager, while still being momentous, instant realization that spring has sprung" also stuck out to me as a lawn-mower. I mow lawns for my neighbors as a side job every year, and the first mowing of the lawn in the spring is so refreshing. Overall, MH's strong usage of the parts of speech makes her essay one that is worth the time to read.
I am complementing an essay written by FK. Everything that I have read seems to be very accurate and is written very well. They use many different points to argue both sides of their topic, online dating versus real dating. One part of a sentence taught me something that I had previously not known about online dating. They were talking about how online profiles "match your personality and interests with someone who fits your criteria best" and that seems like a great idea. Meeting someone in real life can be great but when you approach someone all you know about them is their looks. With online dating you still know what they look like, but you also know who they are, what interests them, and if they are still someone that interests you. I could go on and on about how well this essay is but I think that everyone should just read it for themselves.
I read TR's classification essay about different types of bricks that can be used, consisting of the Fillers, Billers, Killers, and Grillers. He used many subtle references to things used in real life, like legos in relation to bricks. This essay is very humorous throughout and constantly made me want to continue reading to find out what else TR would through in to change up the style. One of the funniest parts of this essay is that he references a made-up character with the alias Bricky Brickerson. He cites this character in such ways as, "As the legendary figure Bricky Brickerson put it, “it is not a wall that is thrown through a window, but rather a single brick.” Although this essay is quite whimsical TR also makes sure to add in many different styles and lengths of sentences which makes the essay flow, and makes it easy to read. In the beginning of a paragraph that talks about how bricks could possibly be used as a weapon he introduces the paragraph by saying, "When the times are desperate, and somebody has a strong desire to end a peer’s life, a brick might just serve the objective at hand," which I think is a very brilliant way to get a point across to a reader, and let them know what the paragraph will be about. This essay was fun to read and kept me wanting to read more.
I have chosen to read over Trey Hubers argumentative essay about why kids should not be given participation trophies. This is one of the essays that for sure really makes you think about which side you're on. There are definitely pros' and con's to each side, leaving it up to you to have to think it through. I like the title, it gives what the essay is about and what happens because of it. The first paragraph is a perfect hypothetical situation to explain why it is unfair for everyone to be given participation trophies, when not everyone deserved it. "Even thought Johny's team played hard all season and won every game, the players got the same trophy as the kid that was out picking his nose in right field." This really gives the reader an image of how this would play out and how unfair it really is. "Bowen found that playing sports encourages kids to get better and that awards do help; however, those awards have to be earned." I appreciate this sentence because it is straightforward and about a huge main point to the essay—trophies must be earned. Great essay, their writing styles mix well and are not distinguishable. They do not get off topic or cause confusion for the reader.
TH's Causal essay covers a subject in which I know not much about, but am mildly interested in learning more about the topic. Phobias are an interesting phenomenon, and TH does a great job in tackling the topic and explaining it in a way that the reader can easily understand. In the introduction he stresses how a phobia is so much more than a fear or anxiety about something, but those suffering from a phobia "have an overpowering need to steer clear of anything which triggers their anxiety." Later on, he explains that phobias can be separated into 2 different categories, evolutionary phobias and learned phobias. He explains that evolutionary phobias "are instilled within you from very early on," while learned phobias are "that are brought on by a very negative experience with a certain stimulus."
I am complimenting AD on her classification essay, “The Vigilante, The Boy Scout, and The Newbie: Classifying Superheros”. I love how she made headings for each category and how it helped organize the essay as a whole. She used a lot of wonderful examples that really helped you classify in your head which superhero would fit where. She uses great description words in her sentences like when she says, “His seemingly make-shift rational revolved around his friends.” This description helps the readers get more information and insight on this particular character. She also inserts vocab words in effortlessly. One example is when she wrote, “The Vigilante tends to be taciturn; only talking when necessary.” My tablemate also has great ideas about how to organize her paragraphs. She didn’t just do a single paragraph for each classification, but she usually did about three or four to really get her point across and by using examples. Overall her organization and descriptors only helped her essay and made it so enjoyable to read. I recommend this essay to anyone, especially the people who love and understand superheroes.
The Essay I read is from my tablemate BD. His essay is about how violent movies do not cause violence or other bad behaviors in people. It is a very intriguing essay because it relates more to teenagers than most, which relates to me cause I am a teenager myself. His essay reflects himself which I believe is a skill every great writer needs. When people write and put a piece of their life into the story, no matter how small, the essay seems to flow and is more enticing to continue to read. He relates to youth when he wrote “ In hip hop there we see themes of emotional struggle as well as economic struggles that mirror many problems the youth are facing.” This sentence is great and allows young readers to relate to the topic. Another great sentence he wrote is “Paying attention to the song is crucial for understanding if the song is trying to glorify and make these themes popular, or whether it is trying to bring these themes to light.” This sentence is strong and gives a look into how people should approach music that may have only been looked at one way in the past.
I chose to read the essay of GB and LE. Their essay was about how the effects of technology can be very harmful to people. Their essay is quite interesting and very informative on how the use of technology can be dangerous, especially for young adults and teens. One tidbit of information that they mentioned was that "the use of technology can be linked to insomnia because of the phone...(and many more examples), throws off the melatonin production in the brain." The two have found ways to grab the attention of the reader and help to focus on anything that could happen, but most don't realize. Another great quote that I have found in their essay is: "that the amount of teenagers and young adults that have been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and other mental disorders has skyrocketed within the past twenty years." I found this information quite shocking and made me realize what effects technology has on younger generations. Overall, I thought that GB and LE wrote an informative and persuasive essay, using strong word choice and presenting it in a thought out manner.
I am complementing the essay of GE. Specifically, I am analyzing his comparison-contrast essay. All in all, I thought it did a great job comparing sweaters and sweatshirts. An important tidbit to take away from this essay is that sweaters don't have hoods and sweatshirts do. Also sweaters don't have a pocket on the front. These are some great observations but they are just the obvious things that he put in his essay. Some more intricate theories on the subject can be witnessed when he says "Although hoodies have many assets that make it seem like the right choice in every occasion, sweaters, more often than not, are overlooked, but their positive qualities can match that of an average hoodie." This quote just goes to show that he managed to take a deep look into a seemingly shallow subject. Another quote that emphasizes his take on the subject is when he says "While hoodies evince the world that you are in with the current trends, sweaters proclaim that you may have a few nuances and that you travel against the current." I love this quote because it glimpses a look into the more obscure side of the sweater/sweatshirt issue. Overall, this essay accomplishes it's goal of distinguishing the difference between sweater and sweatshirts very well and I would recommend it to anyone in need of some intellectual inspiration on the subject.
I am analysing WG’s Comparison-contrast essay. It is a wonderful piece going over the accuracy of movies in hollywood. He is comparing and contrasting how “inspired by” and “based on” a true story can mean completely different things to a movie director. The essay is quite enjoyable to read from its sarcastic and dry humour to its insightful information on the movie industry. An example of his humor can be found when analysing Titanic, “The only thing that the movie seemed to get right is that the boat sank. That is it.” With plenty of information and details jammed into every sentence, the essay is clearly knowledgeable and you can trust what you are reading. His knowledge of the movie industry shows best when he goes the different marketing strategies used by movies and how horror movies devalue the phrase “base on”. Using well crafted sentences with parallelism and near anadiplosis like, “Its majesty cannot be denied in the eyes of a movie enthusiast, but through the eyes of a historian, the movie is just a depiction” also make the essay read smoothly. Overall, the essay is a joy to read which also is informative about a fairly casual topic that many people know and enjoy.
I read through my tablemate KG’s causal essay. The topic of this essay is about the addiction of gambling and how it affects other people. The very first paragraph was what really drew me in. KG uses very vivid and descriptive words throughout. He really described the scene and made me feel as if I was in that situation. He starts the paragraph with “Congratulations!” I thought this was a great tactic used by him because I was instantly questioning what I was being congratulated for. Addiction is all around us and KG does a wonderful job explaining why they are. In his essay, some research from thefix.com really intrigued me, “If someone were to lose a close family member at a young age...they are 26 times more likely to have some sort of drug, alcohol, and/or gambling addiction in the future.” I find this particularly interesting because I lost my father at a young age and did not know that I am more likely to have an addiction that those that have not.
I will be complimenting my table partner HH’s comparison-contrast essay. I was actually debating whether or not I wanted to do my essay over the drinking age so it was a topic I am also interested in learning more about and was excited to hear her opinions about it. I found her paragraph about how consuming alcohol in moderation can be beneficial for your health. HH stated, “susceptibility to catching a cold could be decreased by 60 percent… also showed signs of being able to prevent people from contracting type 2 diabetes”. Information like this can be very persuasive when trying to prove a point because I believe everybody can agree that we want to do anything we can to improve our health and if drinking alcohol is one of those ways then that is a plus. She also wrote about how people are more likely to drink illegally if the drinking age is raised. The repercussions of this are shown in this sentence, “if these people are illegally drinking they are less likely to call a family member or cab to pick them up”. Drinking and driving is a dangerous problem and too many of these accidents include teenagers. I do believe that the drinking and driving percentage would be increased if the drinking age was too. HH showed that she was very knowledgeable about her topic and included logos, ethos and pathos making her essay irresistible to agree with.
For this specific blog task I had the pleasure to read my tablemate AD’s classification essay about the different echelons of superheros. Not only was her essay incredibly pleasurable to read, but also brought things to a different light that I had not yet thought about, such as how we can relate to the different categorizations. As someone who has an incredibly low knowledge of superheroes this could have easily been a boring essay for me. Although, AD did not disappoint, her essay was entertaining and made me want to watch some of the films to get a better understanding of the superheroes. I particularly liked in the second paragraph when she described the Vigilante as a person whose “...pain of their past pushes them to help any life form in need no matter the cost.” I also liked that AD related common people to superheroes in her conclusion paragraph by saying that “Superheroes may not always get along, but will come together when needed. And although regular people do not stop alien invasions, some fight real world battles. Everyday people volunteer to fight in wars, aid in disaster relief, and much more.” Overall this was yet another one of her excellent essays that was a joy to read.
I am writing about my temporary tablemate, FB’s, classification essay. She perfectly described and classified each of the three types of runners: Show-off, Shufflers, and Shirkers. The categories set you off on the right (or left) foot, and give you an idea of exactly what you are in for. FB does an exceptional job of including detail in her essays. “Groups of middle-aged women power walk...the occasional family with kids...one pulling a buggy filled with giggling toddlers.” This quote taken from the introduction made me feel as though I was actually people-watching in the park. In each of her paragraphs about the individual class of runner, FB adds to her essay by describing what kind of friend each type of runner might be. This observation caused me to question what type of runner/friend I might be, as well as what my friends and family might be. Overall, FB did an excellent job of composing an essay over a subject she is passionate about, as well as making it enjoyable to read!
My tablemate, TW, wrote a gorgeous classification essay. His essay caught my attention because the information he provided relates to me and I can apply it to my daily life. He classified the many different types of drivers seen on the road every day and helped me, the reader, to know how to best deal with each to avoid getting into any accidents. I found that I easily fit into what he called the “Cautious driver” category. I learned that it is important for me to continue to drive safely because although this may “frustrate other types of drivers” arriving at my destination safely is more important. I really enjoyed the repetition of a single sentence throughout his story. TW wrote near the end of almost every paragraph “If [each category would put these ideas in place when driving] the road would be safer and more enjoyable to travel on” to continue to remind the reader of this thesis statement. This was effective because it wrapped up each paragraph cleanly and used interesting literary devices to keep the reader's attention. The most interesting of the exam items he used was surprisingly the semicolon. He used it flawlessly twice in one section by saying “These drivers take it slow; these drivers like to look around; relaxation is why these drivers are out.” Overall his essay drew my interest and he clearly had a connect to his writing and was passionate about it, which made it all the more impactful.
I am complementing the well written causal essay by my tablemate LE. In her essay, she explored the reasoning behind why serial killers kill. I knew that some people killed others to get revenge, but it did not make sense to me why they would kill others after they got revenge. She explained that "they repeat this over and over giving them the power to kill them as many times as they can," which I think put something so unexplainable into a way that makes it understandable. Later LE compared the enjoyment serial killers get from murdering to the joy that drug addicts get when they abuse drugs; however, she made sure to specify that "serial killers are more focused on hurting others, while drug abusers main focus of destruction is on themselves." I like that although she compared the two, she explained that drugs harm the people who choose to abuse them, but serial killers harm and take the lives of innocent people. Serial killers intrigue me because I cannot fathom why any person would take the life of another for their own joy or benefit. LE did an exceptional job of investigating why a person would do something as devastating and extreme as what serial killers do. The research she had to back up her statements was vast and reliable, showing that she really invested time into unearthing the cause behind why serial killers commit such atrocious acts.
I am choosing to write this blog task my tablemates SH and KW’s essay about why hard work is better than toil. I chose this essay because I related to the topic. I am a firm believer that hard work will always overpower talent if talent does not work hard. I believe that without the continued hard work, talent would cease to exist. After scanning their essay, I can see that it very well written with a lot of passion and thought going into it. Two quotes from their essay that specifically stand out to me are, “The idea that things come easy is something that no person should feel, some things do come easier than others, but a feeling of self-gratification and praise comes from persistent work ethic” and “The question that needs to be asked is, how are you advancing yourself?” Both of these quotes show their knowledge and understanding of their topic and truly pull the reader into their essay. I believe that their essay is great topic to research and explain to demonstrate how working hard pays off in life.
I am analysing and complimenting my tablemate KG’s argumentative essay. The topic of this essay is about why you should go away for college. I was very interested in this essay because every student has to worry about if they either want to go to college or not. Or what college to attend. With reading this essay, it helps explain how “moving to a college forces you to be a responsible person”. I agree with that a hundred percent, because to be successful in your future you have to be responsible. Another thing mentioned in the essay that I found interesting was that “Many people think of college as a stepping stone into adulthood”. I think many people worry about attending college and moving away for college because you actually have to grow up and be independent. KG wrote this essay wonderfully, and talked about relevant topics about why people should go away for college.
I am choosing to write this blog task my tablemates SH and KW’s essay about why hard work is better than toil. I chose this essay because our class did a debate and it was super intriguing. I personally believe that talent can always over power hard work. In my personal life was faced with switching instruments as stated before in my compare and contrast essay. I believe that I could have worked as hard as I ever could, but without my natural talents I would have not made the Snareline. This essay is very well written with a lot of passion and thought going into it which is very nice. Two quotes from their essay that specifically stand out to me are, “The idea that things come easy is something that no person should feel, some things do come easier than others, but a feeling of self-gratification and praise comes from persistent work ethic” and “The question that needs to be asked is, how are you advancing yourself?” The second took me while to understand , but I feel as though it is saying that are you always counting on your talent to advance in your life.
I will be complimenting KD's causal essay regarding conflict in the Middle East. I appreciated the way she wrote in a way that was understandable but sophisticated. It was clear that she had done an immense amount of research on the topic she chose and that she had a lot of enthusiasm for the issues that she presented in her essay. When explaining the main cause for the conflict in the Middle East, KD points out the differences that the Sunnis and the Shiites possess. She explains, "The tension between the two groups has escalated so much that some have described it as a modern day holy war taking place in the Middle East." She also points out that the problems in the Middle East are not always caused by the people of the Middle East. The disarray in that part of the world can also be blamed on other countries and that it is not uncommon for "foreign countries and governments to meddle with Middle Eastern affairs." Overall, this essay was one of the more informative essays that I have read and I think that the writer did a great job at researching and explaining the cause of the conflicts in the Middle East.
My compliments go out to NM’s casual essay which was executed with precise skill. His casual essay was based on the on-going struggle of cancer and what the main causes are. Right off the bat he tells of how much of a widespread issue cancer truly is with, “600,000 people projected to die of cancer in 2017.” This simple fact really helps bring out why cancer is a big deal and makes his topic more alluring to the audience by bringing out straight statistics to back up his reasoning for the causes and relating the issue to others. NM does this by stating, “One might know of a family member or friend contracting it.” This then helps the audience relate to the topic of the essay and helps keep the flow going overall. Another factor that makes NM’s essay so unique is how he tells of the three main causes for cancer in such a simplistic way that the cure for cancer itself would seem not to far out of bounds if one were to take decisive action against it.
GB and LE Their essay was very well written and thought out. They know how to tug at the heartstrings when the mentioned Sydney Loofe. They quoted a quote from her parent’s Facebook, which was a perfect quote because they were able to create empathy for Sydney, but also create a stronger defense on their side that they were fighting. “The amount of teenagers and young adults that have been diagnosed with anxiety, depression and other mental disorders has skyrocketed within the past twenty years”—they mentioned this in their essay which helps their defense because the studies behind this research are proof that it has risen dramatically in the last couple of years. They also said that “Of course technology is beneficial to our lives and has not just made living easier, but greatly improved most aspects of life,” which everyone can relate to on a technologically advanced level. Their essay was very good and definitely swayed my opinion of technology.
I’m going to be writing about my table mate BP. His essays are expertly written, and they show that he not only fully understands the topic but he also knows how to write an essay to fit in with the theme and requirements at hand. One sentence in his classification essay exemplifies this. “Even at practice your average Handsome will have all of their skin covered in the latest sports wear” shows to explain and give examples as to how one category can be identified in the real world (Petersen). The sentence is written to show that the particular category is completely inundated in how their appearance shows. In another instance, he writes “Nearly 4 hours later, I awoke from my deep food coma to my mother’s voice piercing my ears” (Petersen). This sentence related the feeling of being woken up after an unexpected sleep, and helps to expertly progress the narrative in his essay.
I will be complimenting JP’s essay of the classification of sports fans. I believe he did an outstanding job on classifying them in an interesting manner. Instead of just classifying each type of fan in an overused category, JP compared each type of fan to a kind of candy. Such as a Jawbreaker is the die-hard fan who sticks with his team no matter what. He describes these fans as being, “maniacs-wild, disorderly, overzealous.” There’s also the snickers bar who are the fans who bandwagon the team that is doing good that year. He describes them by saying, “You see, like a Snickers Bar melting in the sun, a bandwagon does not stay loyal to their team when times are tough.Lastly, there is skittles fans. These are fans that like multiple different teams, however they are not a bandwagon. I think that JP did a really good job on this essay as he incorporated comparing different fans to different candies. This idea was very unique and made reading his essay very enjoyable.
I will be writing about DK’s causal essay about why humans are so competitive. This essay was very well written and he went into depth and explained things thoroughly. He connected with multiple groups of people by explaining athletic sports with also video games. He describes how each group can be competitive in their own way and what makes people have that drive to win. One reason he thinks people are competitive is because “just like wolf pack leaders and alpha males, who through strength and leadership command others of their kind, humans want to show their dominance over each other too”. DK believe that human nature and wanting to show superiority over one another is one reason people have that drive to win. A big part of being human is having emotions. DK believes these emotions also push people to being more competitive. DK believes the joy of winning is one of the best feelings we receive by saying “nothing beats the joy of winning a tight game against a rival team or placing first in a national geography bee”. Having the satisfaction of going up against other people and coming out on top is one of the most exhilarating feelings we can receive.
I will be complimenting MP's casual essay. Her topic choice was excellent as it is very relevant and applicable to the lives of high school students. She did an amazing job explaining why cheating is found so often in schools and how it can be detrimental to future generations, as she says, “cheating is everywhere, and it only hurts our future.” Her essay is very informative when it comes to the thought process of kids who cheat in classrooms. Often times, it comes from being lazy, but it can also come from self-doubt. She makes a very good point when saying that kids are afraid to be wrong so they simply find alternate ways to get the right answer. Kids are not realizing that it is normal to be wrong at times, in fact, “part of the learning process is trial and error.” Overall, this essay is wonderfully written and MP clearly put a lot of research and time into this paper.
The essay I chose to examine is the one and only, JD. No, not the distraught, somewhat emo, trenchcoat-wearing psycho from Heathers, but rather Josh Donahoe. His essay, titled "Big Bucks: Positive Points of Hunting", addresses the moral implications of hunting, and why humans still partake in it despite the fact we no longer require it to survive in our modern society. I was most impressed with how Josh presented the crucial factor of the hunt being more important than the kill. For many hunters, the thrill of hunting down their prey is far more rewarding than the actual securing of the prey. This lust for outsmarting one's prey is a primordial instinct hardwired into humans. As Josh quoted from Michael Chamberlain, "When I’m matching wits against a buck I’ve chased for years, I’m matching my skills against his knowing he’ll have to make a mistake for me to have any hope of having a chance to see him." The line that really hit me the most is the last sentence of that same paragraph, where Josh states that "after all, nothing worth doing is easy." That hits deep for me. Good work so far, Josh.
I had the pleasure of reading MB's causal essay on why some people enjoy running and others dread it. I personally do not enjoy running and so it was very interesting to read about different reasons this could be. MB's essay went into specific details about different factors such as body structures and personality types that affect how much a person enjoys running. She did an amazing job at helping to explain this phenomenon, which is something I have often wondered myself. I completely agree with MB's statement when she says that "running is more of a mental sport than physical." Having multiple friends and family members that enjoy running and have even dragged me along to go on runs with them, I have noticed how much running is so much more than merely moving one foot in front of the other at a fast pace. MB speaks to this clearly and directly in her essay and uses profound imagery and relative information to help prove her points. She also makes an interesting observation with her data collection of students at our school that shows that when running is used as a punishment in a sport, it directly influences that person's outlook on running. She claims that "using running as a punishment is counterproductive. Negative associations with running are guaranteed when running is used as a punishment." I agree with this statement and learned a lot with MB's many other astonishing statements throughout the essay. Overall, MB had a wonderfully written essay that gave new insight to me that I didn't know before. Her passion for the topic was clearly shown through her excellent and ambitious word structure and vibrant techniques. It was a beautifully written paper.
I will be complimenting on my tablemate, GB’s, amazing compare-contrast essay. Right away, in the beginning, her words drew me into her essay and kept me wanting to read more. “Imagine yourself walking down the crowded streets of New York, blinded by the bright and vibrant signs, taking in the smells of various restaurants as you pas”. The use of adjectives throughout the essay fills my mind with images. With the abuse of drugs on the rise, the information given was very enlightening. “Since we live in a world where drug use has become scarily common, it has become necessary to look into what is most commonly used, what is most dangerous and what may just have a bad reputation.” this sentence flowed very well and has great grammatical structure that I wish to apply in my future essays. Overall the essay was informative, descriptive, and she showed great knowledge about the topic.
I read my table mate JL's classification essay. Right from the beginning he had a really intriguing start. There was a huge metaphor that really caught my eye. For a second it threw me off because I thought it was a metaphor but it was long so I thought it actually wasn't, but then it did turn out to be one. I loved it! The metaphor was talking about when you're bored. If you are really bored you could do a puzzle but sometimes there is a piece missing. He then related that scenario to a musical missing from an iconic band. I loved this!! It went from a little predictable to a great surprise! I also found amazingly composed sentences. "Responsibility is a major weakness of his—which is where the Monopoler comes in handy—and he can’t really be counted on to get anything done, except for advertising through social media or meetings." I thought this sentence was particularly good because not only did it use great structure and final exam terms, but it also brought back information from the previous sentence selling his case. The other sentences, The same goes for when one is putting a jigsaw puzzle together." One needs the frame, the picture, the passion, and the indifference to complete it." I loved this! It followed his intro paragraph perfectly. It also brought back that amazing metaphor that drew me into reading his paragraph. Great job JL!
The main person I will be commenting on about their essay is Andrew Erkonen. His essay was about the ethical dilemma of hunting game and if it is good or not. His essay was much better than what I expected, he was very good at working against a topic that he does not really believe in. He himself is not a firm believer in the cause that he was writing about, but he was able to make it seem as if he was. Andrew and Ty sold out when giving their points, and their vocabulary showed. It is very interesting to read what other peoples phrasing and vocabulary is like. When all you see is your own writing, it is easy to become tone deaf of sorts and not really see the beauty in writing. Reading Ty and Andrews's essay really refreshed me in writing and gave me some ideas for my own writing
I read HW's classification essay. It was a fun essay based on the five types of cross country fans out there. I choose the classification essay because many people had very interesting topics for their essays. Her essay is very well written and has wonderful flow to it. She did an amazing job explaining the differences between all the different types of fans. It is easy to tell that she put a lot of thoughts and efforts towards making this essay phenomenal. It was a fun essay about the fans of cross country and you could easily relate it to any sport. Overall, it was a very well written essay and a fun essay to read.
I found NH's classification essay very interesting. I enjoyed reading his essay very much because of how relatable it was. He classified the people of Brandon! The three different groups classified in his essay are the friends, foes, no-shows, and the unknowns. One of the best aspects of NH's essay is the distinctiveness of each group. He made it very clear and left little to no grey area. This makes it very easy for the reader and eliminates any confusion. Another thing that I really enjoyed while reading NH's essay, was all the interesting modifiers that he used. It adds great detail and makes everything sound just that much better. My favorite point in his essay is when he used a modifier to begin the paragraph while introducing the next group. I thought that it was a genius idea and really set the tone for the whole paragraph. Overall I really enjoyed reading NH's essay because it was very detailed and very relatable.
The success of BH’s Causal essay lies in the topic of the actual essay, and the flow of thinking that structures the essay. BH wrote about the nature and purpose of vulgar language used by people across languages. The essay draws on many different disciplines, including biology, psychology, and sociology to explain why people swear. Vulgar language is commonly used by many people, and it is interesting to know how many factors influences swearing. It seems a little surprising that swear words make up about only “0.7% of the vocabulary of the average English speaking person.” However, swear words can often work as more than one form of speech, making it easier for people to slip them into conversation more often. They dedicate much of their essay to the idea that swearing is not necessarily always bad because it holds its own communicative potential. For example, part of the emotional nature of swear words comes from the fact that “the speaker is willingly throwing aside any sort of care that they might be judged for using these word.” This can be a way to display trust in the listeners, thus bringing the group of communicating individuals closer. The structure of the essay also adds to the overall composition, as it builds on questions posed and then answered, which I find is a common way of thinking through questions in conversation or real life.
I chose to read IK's causal essay and oh boy was I pleased. Not only was the essay interesting enough to keep me reading but also inspired me to do a bit of researching myself! Reading this essay has allowed me to realize that I do enjoy viewing art and hope to someday be an art fanatic. All jokes aside I did truly enjoy reading this essay and to say it is successful in captivating readers would be an understatement. The composition of the essay itself is admirable because it manages to highlight and integrate every point that the writer makes with the rest. It is fair enough to say that this masterpiece is art itself! I think a writer has truly succeeded when they manage to inspire interest in the reader. As the reader, I found myself seeing some bits of information in the essay that I just had to know about more myself and as a reader, there is nothing more exciting than to dive head first into a topic that you have never even considered to be something you might enjoy! I truly think this essay is a work of are for reasons other than were mentioned in the paragraph and beautifully composed.
I will be complimenting CW’s causal essay about why poverty is still a prevalent issue in the US today. She talks about how certain society’s structural problem, the cultural idea of poverty and the ever-growing number of natural disaster help lead to the increase of poverty that we know today. It is a very welled informed view on how our society today looks at poverty as well as what we will need to do in order to make a difference. I particularly like the way that CW phrases the way people live life in Poverty. “To people in the underclass, life is lived in the moment” (3). I completely believe this and think that this is a correct to express life. She also writes about how poverty is passed down from person to person through behaviors. She says that “If a child sees their parents and grandparents with a pessimistic outlook on life, they will learn that attitude” (4). I like this I can believe in this 100 percent. Kids learn from a parents behavior so it is not far-fetched to believe that this is how the world inherits poverty. I like CW’s paper and with for her to write more.
I chose to read DK's essay on why people are so competitive. Right away I was intrigued by what he had to say because of the way he dove right into the topic without dilly-dallying which meant to me as buckle up because we've got some things to cover. This was exemplified in his thesis statement when he says, "People are competitive because they are pressured to by the capitalistic economy around them, they want to show their superiority to others, and their emotions drive them to compete." I saw this and I was like heck yes these are all such different topics and I was curious as to how he was going to pull them all together. He then went on to talk about capitalism and since I'm a sucker for some solid history I loved it. I was definitely his target audience. A sentence that stood out to me was, "Inside the mind, people subconsciously view each other under a new light, finding competition between others where none used to exist before." This got me thinking about my day to day life and how I always seek out a competition with myself or others to make things more interesting. If I feel like I don't want to do something I incentivize it so that I can win something at the end as long as it happens within a time frame or another condition. DK did a very good job of making capitalism a fascinating topic about self-awareness (at least with me).
89 comments:
The essay I will be complimenting is the causal essay written by one of my amazing tablemates. It is very detailed and well-thought out. I can tell that my tablemate put a lot of work and research into his essay. His hard work definitely paid off. He supported his opinions with valid, coherent thoughts and with reliable, scholarly sources. He also used different types of sentence structures that made his essay more enjoyable to read. One sentence that showed unique structure was “The overwhelming influence in our lives is growing by the day: technology is becoming more and more widely used and depended on.” I also like how he looked at both perspectives of some things. He stated that some people use technology to get noticed, while others “use the internet in order to be anonymous,” encompassing a larger range of people who use technology. He did a remarkable job of explaining why something is the way that it is, and that is not always an easy feat.
I will be complimenting my tablemate CW's causal essay about why teenagers sleep a lot. The whole essay is full of smart words and details about why students do not get all the sleep that they need. She also talks about how our brain is not fully ready for the school day until around 10 in the morning. If a student does not get all the sleep they need they could have medical problems that arise. She says, "In other cases, excessive daytime sleepiness can be a sign of other problems. Insomnia, depression, or narcolepsy—all are examples of medication side effects." I think it is important that she added these so students know how bad not getting enough sleep can be. She also states that 25.4% of our grade get less than 8 hours a night. That isn't good for our grade and could affect test scores and other grades dramatically. Overall, I think she did a really good job with making her essay original and making things unique.
I will be writing about my tablemate JK's compare-contrast essay on the similarities and differences between League of Legends and traditional sports. We actually worked on this essay together and I must say working with him was a pleasure. JK brings information from both sides of the spectrum, including vivid details and in-depth knowledge. JK is not a big sports guy, but he sure does love his esports. He was able to bring details of what traditional sports are like to him, a guy that does not watch sports regularly. "The traditional sports fan is seen as the most die-hard personality in modern cultures. Some fans even go to the extent of dressing up as their team mascot or their team name." JK was a great tablemate who brought great information to the table. So great we are in fact writing our argumentation essay together because the first time was too good to only create once. Expect great things from JK.
I will be complimenting KD’s classification essay. Her essay classifies the many different types of students in high school. KD put a lot of thought into her essay and speaks the truth about her topic. She makes the point that “parents are some of the most influential people in a child’s life…” and that their actions as they grow could be caused by how they were raised. She also makes sure to take some of the blame off the parents and put it solely on the student themselves. Some parents do everything correctly, but their child still chooses to disregard them and rebel. I also really loved KD’s paragraph about the “mundane” students. She doesn’t make being average seem bad or boring. She makes it known that they, while being considered average, are still very important to the school. She even states that they are “the type of students that would make phenomenal extras in every high school movie ever made.” While the average people don’t excel at everything, they simply go with the flow. They might be passionate and excel in activities outside of school. A school is simply a place for them to learn. Overall I think KD did an amazing job with writing her essay. It is unique, truthful, and well thought out.
I will be complimenting my table mate ML’s causal essay about caring for hair. This essay is very interesting for the reason that has is a huge part of our lives and hair is associated with social norms and a person's identity/status. She explained how hair is a stereotype with female having long hair while males have short hair. ML’s states “since the start of this phenomenon [hair length as a source of identity], hair lengths especially embedded itself as a gender identity.” I agree with this statement because our society associates long hair with a female. Throughout the whole essay she ties in history with the present and how society has changed their views on hair. Another point of interest in the essay was in the past women were expected to be inside the house, doing house chores, while the men would be out in the public and workforce. “Long hair generally shows that you do not do much strenuous work.” She incorporates many vocab words and work cited with history and facts about hair that I never knew before, making this an interesting and informative essay.
EH’s comparison-contrast essay is phenomenal. It compares Mondays to Fridays and EH does a wonderful job of expounding on that. She compares Mondays to storms and Fridays to rainbows. She does a masterful job of bending conventional grammar and writing rules. She writes in third person, but her personality most definitely shows itself throughout the essay. When she writes about Monday, I can relate to everything she says. It seems she is speaking to me. And when she lets the reader know that she is writing the essay on a Monday, the empathy is practically tangible. She sees the sad tidings that Mondays bring and laments with the rest of humanity. Her description of Fridays is also very accurate. There is nothing quite like the feeling of relief and rest on a Friday. EH sees that and displays the same joy in her writing. I was most impressed with her way of comparing the two. She says they both symbolize a fresh start, which is true. She closes with a cute quip about singing in the rain.
I will be complimenting my table-mate GA’s masterful comparison-contrast essay. She decided to examine the differences between that of softball and baseball. Not only did she give multiple differences to the sports but also gave ethical understandings to those who are not familiar with the lifestyles such as “you hear someone asking a girl if they play baseball. BIG mistake!” What is so fascinating about this essay is not just the content, but how it is written. I found myself to want to continue to read and discover more differences when I personally do not have any inclination to read about softball/baseball. But her essay changed that as I never felt board but instead enlightened about the differences I never picked up on. What I also enjoyed is how it was written. She found a way to make the words flow together making her as the author sound intelligent and very well educated on the subject. If I was unaware of who she was I still would have believed every word she said with utmost truth. Her verbiage as well as fascinating as to how she could so easily transition a sentences or topic with a “however” or a simple comma. It is truly magnificent phrasing as to which I applaud her! My favorite was how she used the requirements of the essay (vocab words, final exam terms…) to embellish her essay instead of just throwing it in for the grade. She really spent time figuring out how to use these to her advantage and make the essay truly another level. An example of where she used a final exam term to clarify is “catcher (who is in charge of the defense).” Which added to the essay instead of seeming as tho unneeded. I personally enjoy this essay and recommend it to anyone seeking an example.
I will be complimenting my tablemate KT’s comparison-contrast essay. This essay compares and contrasts who you are on the outside versus who you really are on the inside. In her essay, she states, “Looking back into the person inside you, one will find the demeanor change into something considerably calmer when they turn into their maskless counterparts”. I believe this expresses much more than our brain can fathom. I like that she puts so much thought into creating this essay to make the reader feel what she is trying to say. Also in her essay, she says, “The kid who walked down the hallway saying “hi” to everyone may go home and cry due to depression. Maybe the girl you sit next to in biology had a family emergency and cannot wait to be alone and just sit”. While many people do not realize these things go on around them, this essay really makes you wonder how your peers or even your friends are feeling on the inside. I like that she put the concept of a person wearing a mask. Most people think of a mask as part of a costume to wear for fun, but others wear a mask because they do not want to share their feelings or flaws. I think she put great effort and enthusiasm into her essay.
I will be commenting on AS'scausal essay. This essay talks about fashion trends among teenagers. I like this topic because is it something that I have a lot of interest in. I love how she starts off the essay, "From off the shoulder tops to joggers to destroyed denim to Chuck Taylors, fashion trends are ubiquitous." This really grabs your attention at first. It really explains well what she is about to start talking about and what kind of outfits are popular today. I also really like how she points out how if one girl wears something to school one day, most girls will realize how cute that outfit is and start doing the same thing. It is being a trendsetter, "Down the hall walks a confident girl wearing a style of shirt no one has seen before that day." Avery has wonderful grammar usage throughout the whole essay. It was very easy to read and relate to. I can tell Avery put a lot of effort into this essay because of the flow of it and the display of knowledge it has.
The essay I will be complimenting was written by one of my very enjoyable table mates. It was filled with passion and creativity. The essay I am complimenting was actually the letters written at the beginning of the semester. My table partner TN wrote to Dan Green a person he looks up to. His letter, as I mentioned before, is filled with passion. He is obviously very passionate about what he does and just happens to share this passion with the person he writes about. He wrote to the person he looks up to with the perfect combination of ethos, pathos, and logos. This not only renders the letter smart and effective but also adds a very personal touch to something that is obviously near and dear to his heart. The letter was obviously not only effective for those who know TN but also to Dan Green himself. Dan Green responded to him and was clearly touched by his effective use of ethos, pathos, and logos enough to take time out of his day to respond to TN, a simple fan of his.
Stengel
RN’s classification essay which classifies medical field students is interesting and entertaining to read. With her use of hypothetical situations and clear organization, RN succeeds at simultaneously informing and entertaining her audience. One of the most relatable situations RN writes about involves medical field students who are more or less pushed into the field by their parents. “He brings home his laundry every weekend just so he can spend time with his parents talking about why they chose this route for him,” this hypothetical situation presented by RN is well-written and is one that I think everyone can match someone to. She also employs various types of sentence structures and strong, compelling word choice. The following sentence demonstrates RN’s excellent use of writing with a variety of sentence starters: “Thrill, excitement, and stress go hand in hand when working with patients.” RN clearly put forth a great amount of effort into her essay, and her dedication shows in her final product.
I am complimenting my tablemate HJ's essay over classifying different types of sports fans. She classifies the sports fans as the fanatic, the feeble, the forced, the facile, and the fool. One of the sentences that I agree tremendously with on HJ's essay is, "The definition of a bandwagon is someone who has never liked the team before, but once they do something phenomenal they fall for the team and start to like them and pay attention to how well they are doing." I agree 100% with this because bandwagons only like that certain team if they are good. I agree with her and think that if you are a true fan then you follow this team, have attire for that team, watch the games, and even go to some games. Another sentence that I strongly agree with is, "The Fanatics are the ones who watch their team while their children are being born, or miss a holiday with their family because their team is playing that day or some choose to not even be around other people while watching the game." This type of fan is the absolute opposite than the bandwagon. These fans are the true fans and I believe the HJ is a true fan of the Green Bay Packers.
I will be talking about my stablemate JT's classification essay. This essay is simply superb, with colorful details and insigthful thoughts throughout. One of my favorite things about this essay is how she classifies something so mundane: the shoppers at Hyvee. We have all been a shopper at a supermarket, so we can all see ourselves as a certain type of shopper; or, depending on our mood, we can see ourselves as all of these shoppers. I also love how colorful and detailed her descriptions of shoppers and Hyvee is. I love how she compares Hyvee to a jungle, and then uses language that conveys how it is akin to the canopy by making us feel that we are in the canopy. Overall, the essay is a stupendous piece of work and I am so glad that I got to read and be apart of the truly impeccable piece of writing that it is.
I am commenting on my table mate CA’s noteworthy classification essay. CA’s essay classifies the types of customers a coffee shop barista experiences within a day. It is very well structured with intense descriptions to really put you in the position of the barista. With the use of imagery and some sarcasm, it is easy to pick up these clues. Every customer she explains has their own type of feeling from the barista attached to it, adding a little bit of spunk and humor within the essay. Many beautifully written sentences are included within her essays but the two sentences I found the best included stellar descriptions and many uses of different final exam terms. One of the sentences I truly appreciated was one with interesting imagery, “With a continuous flow of fruitacious flavor on your taste buds, your mind is at peace.” this sentence really painted the picture for me and made me feel calm. The second sentence I felt was quite masterful was one that said: “They are the nice, easy-going kid—the type you want to watch your pets.” I liked comparison within this sentence and found the use of dashes key to its structure. Overall, CA ended with a publish-worthy essay that I think many coffee shop customers would find comical.
SS's causal essay is relatable and truthful. I enjoyed the first body paragraph when SS began writing about how to be comfortable around another person and not bombard them with mind-boggling information. Although some of the information is common sense, the majority of the essay is extremely informative and helpful when speaking about approachability. One sentence that sticks out to me says, "If you don’t want to be approachable, get a sleeve filled with tattoos, some piercings in the body, some scary skull rings, and a really dark shade of theme going and you will be as unapproachable as that one bartender who lives in Corson and only works nights." SS did a great job in creating imagery and captivating the readers by using something they are familiar with (bartender in Corson). Later in the essay, Sam also states, "it is always good to try new things." The following sentence is simple, but it means so much. SS successfully caught the reader's attention by applying short and sweet sentences to his essay that allow the reader to think critically about them. Overall, SS did a great job on the essay and made it relatable to everyone.
I will be complimenting KP's well thought out argumentation essay. KP's interesting essay is over why books should not be banned from school. "Children should have a choice on what information and stories they want to read." KP obviously cares about kids getting to read what they want and for certain books not to be banned. KP makes extremely clear points that are very well written. The essay keeps the reader interested throughout the whole thing and is very enjoyable to read. "They neglect to look at the book as a whole and ignorantly focus one, often minute, detail." is an example of some clearcut points KP makes throughout her whole essay, that allow readers to look at the situation in a new, different way. KP really did put in a lot of effort to make it so the reader themselves can understand the problem and why things need to change. I think anyone would enjoy reading KP's essay.
I will be complimenting my tablemate RL’s classification essay. In her essay, she classifies cheerleaders into four different groups: the Charlatan, the Ignominy, the Tyro, and the Pro. I can tell she worked very hard on this essay and I like that she started out her introduction paragraph with a statistic about cheerleaders to really grab the attention of the reader. Her vocabulary is impressive, yet understandable. She uses many different sentence structures in order to keep her essay away from predictability. One sentence that really stuck out to me was “If Ignominious are guilt, then Tyros are innocence.”. I like the way she contrasted them while using only one sentence. She kept it simple, yet she still told the reader how they are different. Another sentence that I enjoyed was “Tyros are attracted to the idea of becoming a Charlatan because they see all the attention and love that is thrown at them, this leads to the creation of more and more Charlatans—further deteriorating the image of all cheerleaders.”. I think the structure is well put together and she made good use of a dash. Overall, her essay was great and well thought-out. I can tell she really worked hard on this essay.
I had the privilege of reading through KF's essay entitled "The Dog Ate This Title… :Why People Procrastinate". A causal essay, she explains the causes of procrastination in fine detail, only adding to the completeness of the essay with the creative title. She adds to her proof on the causes of procrastination by adding quotes and ideas from a highly credible researcher, Flett, and by using ideas of perfectionists—those who try to accomplish everything with 110% effort. Her use of perfectionists who procrastinate adds an easy-to-understand example and a point of reference for the readers. She states "If they can not achieve their goals, then neither they nor their task reach perfection." I find this sentence particularly intriguing and enjoy the way it brings sense to her statements. She also adds information about an interesting study done which confirms that people think "The person they are today and the person they will become are separate entities." It shows that her argument that fear is a factor in procrastination, as people are fearful of what they will become and how they will become that person. They push it off because they do not understand how the transition between their current self and future self will mesh. I believe this point is powerful and that KF did an amazing job showing points that normally would not have been thought of.
The causal essay neatly wrote by the man himself, Max Wilder, is an intense conspiracy. This extensive essay breaks down what turns someone into a complete psychopath. It is a very detailed essay that gives you the ability to think when you read the essay. One amazing quote I love from the essay reads, "Psychopathy has been around for thousands of years, lurking beneath the normal mask that people wear." It is crazy to think that some people that are psychopaths think they are completely normal but knowing on the inside they have completely different thoughts lurk around their head. People that murder probably murder because they are completely crazy people that are clueless to know that they are crazy so the absurd thoughts that they give to themselves could seem completely normal to the psychopath. Another good quote reads, 'There are a million factors that could contribute to the cause of psychopaths, but childhood development is always a recurring idea that comes up in discussions." I just like how he includes something to think about just about every sentenced that he typed.
I was able to read the essay of KG, a beautiful essay it is. The topic of money and happiness has always been of interest to me, and I was intrigued from the very start of this essay. I happen to agree with her side of this topic, which made me more persuaded to read it. The essay begins with the true happiness is, by definition anyway. Eventually, the mention of friends and family comes up. With that being said, this quote stuck out to me, "Through jealousy and envy, people have forgotten what makes them happiest: friends and family." I found this to be shockingly true. I realized that people are so caught up in the idea of having a good job and making a good amount of money, that often friends and family, the initial happiness, are pushed aside. KG also mentions that happiness can come from the things you love, like hobbies. This brings me to her next quote, “‘Studies have also shown that cancer survivors do better related to recovery and remission when utilizing hobbies to increase their well-being’” Even in the darkest time of a person's life, there can still be happiness through the things they love, without money. I think that KG's essay is coming together beautifully.
One of my tablemate’s, BT, has written a great essay. In the essay, her and her partners have argued valid points and it is very well organized. My favorite part is the beginning, “Think of every single time you have worked hard for something you strive to achieve; spending hours on end trying to make things as perfect as possible, stressing over an audition or a test that will mean nothing in a week, yet feeling overpowered with joy when you finally accomplish the task at hand.” This sentence is such an attention getter and right away at the beginning of the essay the audience is involved. I loved how it says “think of” because when someone is reading it they will actually think of a time in their life and understand what BT is trying to say. “With hard work comes great reward and a high amount of success.” In my opinion, this sentence is very powerful. It is not very long but it is right to the point. There is a lot of meaning in that sentence. I enjoyed reading this essay. Great job BT!
I have read AF’s Comparison-contrast essay. The start to the essay was beautiful. She opened by telling a story about winning a race. She opened her essay with the sentence, “Motors roaring, wheels spinning, and green flag waving, the start of the race has begun.” The way she told the story was phenomenal as far as imagery goes. I was able to actually imagine a slow motion race that led the driver to the checkered flag. Being a person who knows nothing about cars and racing, I can tell that she is very passionate about what she is talking about and that she is also very knowledgeable on the subject she has chosen. One thing I learned while reading through this essay is, “Sprint cars have four overt wheels and they do not have fenders.” Reading through the essay gave me keen insight on the differences between the two cars she has chosen and what makes each of these cars unique. She used complicated final exam terms to make her essay wonderful. Being knowledgeable in the subject, helped her write far past the requirement for pages which is very impressive. Overall, I think AF’s essay was beautifully written to perfection.
Today, I have the honor to read CM’s classification essay. I was delightfully surprised by this essay; it encased the perfect amount of thought, humor, and honesty. The author classified the different ways people deal with a break up. From binge eating to obsessing, there is a category for everyone. Each classification was perfectly thought out. What I really appreciated was that each class was not just described, but tips on how to deal with these classes were given. The author gave insightful information for people to help their friends that are going through a breakup. Once particular example that I think can be applicable in almost any situation is “friends always needs to be there to help their friends get through rough times”. CM did a great job of including a class for everyone and most importantly, how to help these sorrowful people. In closing, CM was very insightful when she mentioned that people can fall into more than one class. Along with that, it is imperative to be aware of the classes so that one can help their friends in the best way possible. CM said it best when she said that “this thing we call life comes with exhilarations, struggles, celebrations, and sorrow. No one wants to go through the hardships alone”. In addition, breakup classes of people are not only applicable in breakup situations. CM’s classifications can be used to help people dealing with other hardships of life including “the loss of a pet, job, or significant other”. This essay was amazing. It provided insight in how to help people deal with hardships. With the perfect balance of humor, seriousness, and insight, CM did a great job with the classification essay.
I read GK’s comparison essay. His essay starts off very nicely. He is talking about being on a beach and he makes it sound so soothing and calm with, “ The warm sun shining down is giving you the comforting feeling of safety as you lie on the beach without a care in the world.” I love his first paragraph it is worded so well. He wrote it so well it makes you want to keep reading, unlike some poorly written essays. I feel like I am the person walking on the beach. It is very advanced writing. He then goes on saying that he is comparing living real life versus comparing living a dream. He talks in the next paragraph is the goals people have, “Contrary to the concept of having blank pages waiting for the fresh ink of new ideas and goals, some already have outlandish goals that seem completely unachievable.” Saying some people are waiting for their goal and some people have huge goals. His essay was very interesting and fun to read about life and dreams.
I read LV's causal essay about why and how people imagine dreams. To begin, her essay comes off in a very fluid structure. She has a great introduction that gets the reader more involved by asking the question "What did you dream about last night?". This question makes you think and makes you want to learn more. I like how she questions what dreaming is rather than just believing what the experts say. She looks deep into the subject. Another quote that was very good and interesting was from the survey she did on the class. This quote was how "An overwhelming one hundred percent of the sixty-two students responded that their dreams were in images; while only thirty students experience sound and only four report text". I thought that this was interesting because all of the surveyed students found that they saw images in their dreams. Overall, i enjoyed the layout and great information that LV gave throughout her essay on dreams.
I will be complimenting my tablemate MH's causal essay as to why professional athlete's careers end. I chose this essay because I enjoy sports and think it is interesting to read why players stop playing. In his introductory paragraph, he states, "Dating back to the Greece Olympiad, if someone has a particular talent in a sport, they are put upon a pedestal in society." I think this a good way to capture the reader's attention and really get them thinking about how popular athletes are. He gives three reasons as to why professional athletes walk away from the game and builds off of those well in his essay. I like the sentence in his conclusion where he says, "As the popularity of sports in global culture continues to grow and advance, there will always be a necessity for athletes who accel at their craft and a line of athletes who wish to showcase their skill on the professional level." This statement shows truly how big sports are in our world today. There are so many levels of athletics and so many players that want to make it to the professional level. Overall, MH did a very nice job writing this essay and showed that he put a lot of time into finding out why professional athletes leave their sports.
I will be complementing Sydney’s Classification Essay (SN). First off, the title is spectacular, with a great rhyme that tells three different types of people who drive cars. Not only is it amusing, it is specific and to the point about the types. I also like how in her intro paragraph details the importance and responsibility of having a driver’s license. It says “A driver’s license comes with both a supremely high horizon of responsibility as well as an entirely new level of freedom.” This phrase is well thought out and uses alliteration particularly well with “high horizon.” Another phrase I am particularly fond of is “Almost always in a hurry, the Swearing are extremely obnoxious, invidious, and rude. Their windows are usually down, in case of needing to yell swear words at any given moment.” Again, not only is it highly amusing, it details a type and classification of drivers that swear and are obnoxious on the road.
I had the pleasure of reading JT’s classification essay on different types of shoppers at HyVee. In her essay, she used a metaphor to compare the different types of shoppers to various animals in the jungle. As a whole, I found the essay very enjoyable, yet enlightening at the same time. She had an amazing use of imagery, that made the situations described, both in the store and the jungle, come to life. One example of her excellent imagery was when she wrote, “towering shelves around the store, forming a canopy of canned goods and providing the customers with everything they’ve ever wanted.” I loved how this sentence led me to imagine my local HyVee, while simultaneously connecting her metaphor to reality in my head. Not only did JT use imagery very well, she was also tied humor into her essay very well. I found myself chuckling at various parts, and it made the whole essay an entertaining read. At one point, I couldn’t stop myself from grinning when she said, “If the Gorilla is slightly nudged or triggered in any way by another customer, a prayer had better be said.” I thoroughly took pleasure in reading JT's essay and had a great time deciphering which type of animal I am when I shop.
I am complementing EC's Classification essay. Her essay was very beautiful and thought out. She classified people as parts of trees. She classified people into three categories: Roots, Branches, and Leaves. The Roots are the people who are there to support you in any circumstances. The Branches are the people you may not have a deep relationship with, but they still leave an impact on your. Finally, the leaves, are the people who drift in and out of your life depending on the season of life you are in. She displayed a great understanding of people and our relationship to those around us. She had many examples. She painted with her writing. She included many similes This was good because it gave life, interest, personality, and visual to her writing. At one point she talks about the Branches as the random people you meet around you. These brief encounters with these random people do something beneficial for you. She says, “When you see this person it reminds you to slow down your day, have a good attitude, and remember that you are blessed.” This is a great sentence because she is trying to be a Branch in the essay. She is doing what the people do in the essay. The people unknowingly encourage you, and she unknowingly encourages the reader and gives the reader a good reminder about life and the blessings in it. My favorite sentence in her essay is towards the end, when she says, “The job at hand is to determine how you will let the people around you influence you.” This is the high moment in the essay. This is her point, and it is a powerful point. Throughout her essay she taught many simple life lessons in a graceful way.
The essay I will be complimenting is my tablemates Classification topic. FK’s Classification essay is about the different kinds of roommates you could have during college. I love this essay so much because everything she says is true. She has three different categories including the Slovenly, Systematic, and the Sidekick. The Slovenly person is the roommate that always seems to create a mess. Within FK’s essay she says, “Trash is laying all over the floor, clothes are scattered about, homework is scattered across the bed, and a faint, disgusting smell lingers that you wish was not there”. There is also the Systematic roomate. I feel like I would be this kind of roommate because I love to stay organized. My favorite part of her essay is this line, “... papers are scattered about the bed and even though you know exactly what you are doing, the OCD freak is having a meltdown and keeps cleaning up the papers and complaining”. FK’s essay made me laugh and ponder what type of roommate I will have the pleasure of meeting come the move in day.
I read my tablemate AP compare-contrast essay. This essay was about different time periods of art, specifically Renaissance and baroque. AP did a good job with text painting, she gave reasons why the different paintings are from the different time, the descriptions she gave we strong enough to make the reader visualize the different paintings. One of the sentences she said was, "Baroque art has motion and is displayed throughout the painting to draw the beholder’s eye in and follow the motion within the picture." This was one of the sentences that gave me a strong description. Another wonderful part of the essay was she gave credit to both time periods for creating wonderful art although they are very different. Here is an example, In Europe, Renaissance and Baroque art is displayed throughout the museums and churches today showing off the true beauty of these artifacts from the time period."
I read through my tablemate, HH, casual essay. This essay was about the different obstacles people face when going through depression and why people experience it. Learning that there was a difference “between blues and depression”, as she put it, made you truly understand that depression can sometimes be a more chronic obstacle that people deal with on a day to day basis, as opposed to just being sad and then moving on the next day. Her essay made good points and showed readers the true facts behind depression. I learned that there is more to depression than just feeling sad. She brought research to the table and really went above and beyond with her essay. I could tell she put a lot of hard work and effort into this essay and you most definitely could tell by reading it. One of the sentence structures that was most unique was “Furthermore, a great impact on how one gets depression over one who does not is affected by what the individual blamed for failures”. It added good sentence rhythm as well as bringing a solid point to the essay.
I am complimenting FG’s comparison-contrast essay about the similarities and differences between having siblings and not having any. Right away, in the beginning paragraph of the essay, she does a great job at hooking the audience into reading her essay. Then, as you work your way down the essay, it is noticeable at how well the paragraphs flow from one to another. It is as if the paragraph never really ended. The essay also got me to feel connected to it because of how well it describes the lives of those with and without siblings. In the first paragraph, when she said, “When you have an older or younger sibling you automatically have to be able to interact with one another daily whether you like it or not”, it got me really thinking about my relationship with my little sister. Most days I am perfectly willing to interact with her but on the days when I don’t want to I can struggle a lot. I still have to interact with her, but working on that now will help me later when I have a job and need to interact with co-workers everyday. The other part of the essay I felt connected to was when she said, “The only child will typically take charge because they are used to having the process of things go according to how they see fit in their head.” Even though I have a sibling I can still relate to being an only child because my sister is 4 years younger than me and doesn’t share many similar interests with me. This has pushed me to work through challenges on my own and has helped me take charge in doing and enjoying things by myself, a trait more closely related to someone without siblings than someone with them. Creating an atmosphere that lets me reminisce about these things is something hard to do, and with her essay being able create that atmosphere, I think that it is safe to say that her essay is a spectacular one.
I read my table partner KT’s classification essay. This essay was particularly fun to read because of how unique it is. I immediately appreciated the fact that it was about different types of pirates. I was excited to read about it, and the essay did not disappoint. She layered in colorful and creative language throughout her essay. It made me remember my childhood, and watching cartoons like Spongebob and movies like Peter Pan. In the second paragraph, she said, “To become the perfect pirate as a child all that is need is an eye patch, a skull and crossbones shirt, a hat, and the incredibly important sword while asking everyone if they have seen their booty just like the pirates on screen.” Another aspect of her essay I appreciated, was that she had real facts about actual pirates. I was able to reminisce about my childhood, while also learning. I particularly like this sentence: “One of the most common diseases associated with sea rovers is scurvy, or the severe lack of vitamin C.” Overall, I had fun reading this essay, and liked that it had a fresh topic.
I read my tablemate VH's causal essay. I was immediately pulled into the essay by the phrase: "Do you feel some nights that falling asleep seems like a never-ending possibility?". Her essay was organized masterfully, and all of her points were fully thought out. I also appreciated that while talking about the science of yawning, she didn't just only write theories, she also used facts and surveys to confirm her points. She took sources from books, magazines, and scientists, proving that she is very informed on her topic. Her survey concluded, "about 68 percent of students say the main reason that they yawn is because they are tired, 70 percent of students say that they yawn because they are bored, and 10 percent of students say that they yawn because they see someone else yawn". I really enjoyed that she mixed scientific facts with interesting theories and ideas to create an original and informative essay.
I will be complementing RV's Comparison contrast essay. In this essay, he juxtaposed rap and country music, two things that are completely different. While there are obvious differences, he went further into depth by pointing out things that most would not even think about. For example, he wrote about the different attire each musician wears, and even what their goal while making music is. Not to mention, he used impeccable grammar, funny wits, and extensive word choice. Reading his essay helped me to decide what kind of music I was interested in by explaining music. Another thing I really enjoyed about this essay was the aspect of passion. It is clear that he is very passionate about music, and it was shown beautifully in his essay. This essay truly goes above and beyond to not only contrast music types, but also to bring people together through two opposite genres. RV wrote this essay with excellence and effort, and in the end he produced a wonderful essay that I very much enjoyed reading.
I had the privilege of reading JL’s classification essay. Right off the bat, I felt compelled and wanted to read more. JL did a fantastic job with his intro paragraph and making sure the reader related to the situation; I know I did! As he is talking about completing a jigsaw puzzle, one line in his intro paragraph I found to be truly relatable to readers was, “All you can do now is assume that the missing piece was swallowed by a pet, sucked up by a vacuum cleaner to be disposed of, or simply dropped through a portal into another dimension never to be seen again.” This is so incredibly true. The readers immediately want to keep reading because they relate. JL’s essay flows smoothly and his analogy of a band relating to a puzzle makes perfect sense. Later in the essay, JL states, “When one starts to put together a jigsaw puzzle, he or she typically attempts to find all the outside edge pieces first. Similar to the formation of a band, establishing a puzzle is much less complicated when you have a good base.” This paragraph transition is easy for the readers and is relational to his intro paragraph. Again, the analogy is perfect for describing and classifying parts of a band. JL has a stellar essay.
I was honored to read EG's narration essay. Her essay was very compelling in terms of the way she explained her setting. Her detailed explanation of the setting was enough to give me a visual of every word she spoke. One line in particular, though a fragment, I caught was when she said, "The rebellious tree." Though it was a fragment and held no true connotation, it spoke volumes about the severity of the situation present in the essay. After the storm in her story had finished, she explained the aftermath in grotesque detail, as if I were there too. One of her lines she explains when she looks around at the destruction of the storm, "Many of the photos my parents had displayed of me around the house were either blown away into what might as well have been oblivion or they were completely destroyed." EG's essay really worked out well, her writing very exact and virtually flawless. She definitely knows how to convey a good story. EG's essay is amazing.
I read my tablemate Hannah Hendricks scholarship essays. I thought that she incorporated many qualities that helped increase the value of the essays. First off I noticed that she covered every aspect of the questions and answered them very well. She talks about eating gluten-free foods in on of her essays and her struggles that pursued. The most interesting thing was how she says that she is unable to eat wheat, rye, and barley. She adds that "this protein hinders digestion in the small intestines in Celiac patients". This is neat because she gives insight into how it personally affected her and how she later had to deal with it. Some struggles that she dealt with were sacrificing foods that she loved. Luckily, she explains that Hyvee helped her with these struggles. Adding how helpful they were and how much they care for their customers. Overall, I think that she had a stellar essay and is definitely a contender for receiving the scholarship.
I very much enjoyed reading BC's compare-contrast essay. Her passion for comics, both Watchman and Justice League, comes through in her intense writing saying the comics help others "indulge in the fantasy world of these heroes." Knowing nothing about either of these beforehand, I feel much more educated on the topic. Although she loves what she is writing about, she did not shy away from critizisms of either world. She even critized the excessing movies made by Justice league, saying "these stragems are cheap moves". Her writing captured me as an audience and made me want to read the comics for the first time. I have read a few of BC's essays and they seem to create interest where none exists before.
My tablemate, EB, has many great aspects to her essays. One that I paid particular attention to was her Classification Essay. She made a great use of an analogy throughout her entire essay. EB related the different types of students to bowling, including a Straight Ball, a Curve Ball, and a Gutter Ball. I feel that this was a great way to compare students to something that she is truly passionate about. One line that I found particularly interesting was when she said "The only way to avoid these clashes is to teach about these classifications and inform students about how to deal with different personality types". I liked this line because it related her essay to real-world problems that her essay can help to solve. Another line I liked was when she said "Their interpretation of the directions shows how each child -Straight, Curve, and Gutter-is a separate individual, and all require a different degree of attention to be able to learn properly and get the most out of their schooling". I really liked this line because it effectively brings up a large social issue that not everyone is exactly the same as the person sitting next to them. EB's essay was a very powerful message that was well delivered and got the points that se wanted to get across.
I really liked KD's compare-contrast essay. I love how she was able to compare childhood and adulthood, which are two very different things. "Each age group learns so much about life by simply interacting with each other." This is true in many ways because the kids learn how to live their lives by watching and learning from their parents. The kids, on the other hand, teach the adults. They teach them maturity and the parents become a lot wiser when they have kids. "Once an adult comes home, they must run an entire house and keep things under control." This contrast is great because it also shows how much different the two groups are. Children must obey their elders, and eventually, they will become the older and wiser people, and then they will run the house. KD did a great job with this essay and I really enjoyed reading it.
Of the great composers of my corner table in the room, I have decided upon reading an essay written by the astute Ally Boerhave. She has written quite a remarkable comparison-contrast essay detailing the similarities and differences between a pair of the world’s most influential genres of music: jazz and classical music. AB has shown extensive knowledge of the musical styles. She explains the different time signatures used in classical music by showing how to count them out; for example, “⅞ (counted like 1,2 1,2 123)”. Many musically-declined people would have no clue how to count out in ⅞, but she makes sure the detail is getting across. In addition to the explanation of some of the theory behind the music, she also brings up defining characteristics about the different styles that even some musicians do not consider, like the setting in which the music is played: “Because of the beauty and grace classical music carries, a supporting venue that will increase the emotion and purpose of the piece is just as important as the song itself.” Ally is a terrific writer, and I know she will continue to write many more masterpieces.
The essay that I read helped me realize the differences between linemen and wide receivers. I am not an avid Sunday football watching type of gal. In reading BL's "Football's Best: A Juxtaposition of Offensive Linemen and Wide Receivers" essay, I enhanced my ability to be able to completely different roles these football players have. A variety of slang words are used in the game including "bigs" (linemen) and "quicks" (wide receivers). The essay showed BL's passion and awareness for football. I enjoyed learning about football from the perspective of a player.
I read my tablemate KG's classification essay. KG's essay was focused on our school's homecoming. She talked about the uninterested, bashful, miserable, and extreme people. I liked how she talked about how we do things at Brandon Valley High School to make it more relatable. Homecoming week is a time that so many students look forward to every year." I like how she mentioned how she felt about homecoming so everyone knows how she feels about it. It is nice to read an essay you can agree with. You can tell that she put a lot of work in her essay. Her side comments make her essay very organized. As you are reading this essay and thinking, “What type of homecoming student am I?”. She really allows the audience to engage in her essay. I really enjoyed reading her essay and learn about how she classified our Brandon Valley Homecoming.
I read CV's essay about classifying the different types of fans at a football game. While reading this essay I noticed many aspects of it that were fun to see. One of these aspects would be the way the vocab words made sense in all the sentences that she used. An example of this would be "If you end up sitting by the Vain they might encourage you to not cheer or eschew you if you do". Sometimes when students attempt to put vocab words into their essays it results in their sentences not making much sense. But as you can see this is not the case with CV's essay. Another aspect I like about her essay is that she has good introductions into her paragraphs. One of my favorites is the beginning of her third paragraph, "Woohoo! Yelling, jumping, dancing, and singing- these actions all mean "cheering" to the Insane". I liked this introduction because it is fun and helps you visualize how the Insane act.
The argumentation essay I will be complimenting is the essay written by my table mate, Varonica Heinrichs. Our essays are debating whether or not first impressions are of high importance. VH's essay is quite detailed and comprehendible. VH writes passionately while also maintaining a level of professionalism, making the piece easy to follow along with. Her sentences flow well but include scholarly words. One thing I thought made her essay stand out was her idea to incorporate a student survey into her research and use it in her essay. This factor provided an excellent reference to understand her data. Another detail I thought was interesting was her use of the phrase "... we as humans still judge other people because it is in our nature..." This sentence helped me find a way to relate to her standpoint because she was right, every person judges others. VH made an excellent point when she stated, "The interviewer will notice seven things first: your arrival time, what you are wearing, your body language, your communication style, if you are prepared or not, whether you seem excited to be there or not, and then finally if you have the qualifications or not." I genuinely enjoyed reading her essay and I am excited to see how our essays compare and contrast.
I will be complimenting my tablemate GB’s classification essay. In her essay, she compares the four different types of friends, The Pen Pals, The Weekday Friends, The Squad, and The Plastics. After reading her essay I could tell that she had put a lot of time and effort into it. GB incorporated many of our new vocab words and final exam terms in ways that all made sense. For each friend type GB describes both the pros and cons of having them. In her first paragraph, she states that “each friendship has its own uniqueness…” and that is what makes them special to what type of friend they are. I also really loved GB’s paragraph about The Squad. She gives great examples to help describe this type of friend. GB states, “At times it may seem like they know you almost better than you know yourself”. I enjoyed reading GB’s essay, she made it very relatable and fun.
Argumentative Essay written by VH. Her essay is being written about the importance of first impressions. Her argument that first impressions are extremely important holds much value. Through her essay she brings up good points, such as her points detailing the importance of first impressions in interviews. In her words, “The interviewer will notice seven things first: your arrival time, what you are wearing, your body language, your communication style, if you are prepared or not, whether you seem excited to be there or not, and then finally if you have the qualifications or not.” Another point of hers is that body language is very important. She says that “Another important factor is what this person’s body language is conveying and sometimes body language can be more powerful than speaking to a person.” These quotes show that she has done research about her subject and has a good understanding of what is going on in her essay.
I read JD’s classification essay. His essay was about five different kinds of skiers. I enjoyed reading this essay because there was some very interesting points. While reading his essay I could tell his passion and love for skiing and I could also tell he spends a lot of his time skiing during the winter season. I like how he gives great details about each kind of skier. For example, “These skiers can typically be identified by their shaky stance, the obviously farm worn or intended-for-hunting jackets and coveralls they wear, and their quivering transition from turn to turn.” and “Skiers who fit into the show can be found all over the mountain, but most often are located in the terrain park because this is the best place to showboat.” I think JD did an amazing job overall with this essay. He did a great job incorporating the final terms, vocabulary words, and grammatical classification sentences.
In LVR's comparison and contrast essay, it discusses the differences between books and movies and which are more appealing to you. The essay starts off with stating facts, adding credibility, and logic to get the readers attention. LVR states "Beginning as long ago as 3500 B.C, forms of books have been unceasingly popular and have not lost their meaning or practicality. Some people are still loyal to books; but many have turned to movies for entertainment and many thoroughly enjoy both". I think that this was a great way to begin this essay because it grabs my attention right away. She talks about how books contain a lot more intricate detail and tend to be lengthy because the author needs to be able to covey the story. Also, they do not have a specific time frame to tell the story. On the other hand, movies are sometimes the preferred option because even though movies are still intricate they have a time frame that the story needs to be told. Overall, I believe that this essay was very well constructed and is a great masterpiece!
The essay that I chose to read really helped me understand why there are a lot of people who do not do well in college and ultimately drop out. I never understood why someone would drop out of college, mostly because they have already paid a good amount of money and effort to attend college even if it is for just one semester. While reading SN's "Failing, Wailing, and Derailing: Why Students are Unsuccessful in College" she wrote, "students fail in college because they lack focus, motivation, and faith in themselves". This really hit home for me, mostly because I know that if you are to be successful in anything in life, you have to have faith in yourself and be very motivated. Another great quote I came across in my fellow tablemate's essay was “...students who attend institutions of higher education obtain a wide range of personal financial, and other lifelong benefits”. This is a very true statement that I think a lot of people who choose to not further their education miss.
MH's essay about spring and fall is a beautiful juxtaposition of "sister seasons". One of the things she states in her essay is "countless people look forward to the enjoyable seasonal experiences, which happen to only usually be available during that given time each year. Perhaps it is just the looming of heavenly aromas, the manifesting of piquant flavors, or the arrival of various types of activities that occur amid these seasons." This quote helps me think back to the seasons and brings back memories of friends, families, and food. The strong nouns, adjectives, and verbs really make her essay a masterpiece. The line that says "the first mowing of the lawn and the fresh wif that your nose picks up is a meager, while still being momentous, instant realization that spring has sprung" also stuck out to me as a lawn-mower. I mow lawns for my neighbors as a side job every year, and the first mowing of the lawn in the spring is so refreshing. Overall, MH's strong usage of the parts of speech makes her essay one that is worth the time to read.
I am complementing an essay written by FK. Everything that I have read seems to be very accurate and is written very well. They use many different points to argue both sides of their topic, online dating versus real dating. One part of a sentence taught me something that I had previously not known about online dating. They were talking about how online profiles "match your personality and interests with someone who fits your criteria best" and that seems like a great idea. Meeting someone in real life can be great but when you approach someone all you know about them is their looks. With online dating you still know what they look like, but you also know who they are, what interests them, and if they are still someone that interests you. I could go on and on about how well this essay is but I think that everyone should just read it for themselves.
I read TR's classification essay about different types of bricks that can be used, consisting of the Fillers, Billers, Killers, and Grillers. He used many subtle references to things used in real life, like legos in relation to bricks. This essay is very humorous throughout and constantly made me want to continue reading to find out what else TR would through in to change up the style. One of the funniest parts of this essay is that he references a made-up character with the alias Bricky Brickerson. He cites this character in such ways as, "As the legendary figure Bricky Brickerson put it, “it is not a wall that is thrown through a window, but rather a single brick.” Although this essay is quite whimsical TR also makes sure to add in many different styles and lengths of sentences which makes the essay flow, and makes it easy to read. In the beginning of a paragraph that talks about how bricks could possibly be used as a weapon he introduces the paragraph by saying, "When the times are desperate, and somebody has a strong desire to end a peer’s life, a brick might just serve the objective at hand," which I think is a very brilliant way to get a point across to a reader, and let them know what the paragraph will be about. This essay was fun to read and kept me wanting to read more.
I have chosen to read over Trey Hubers argumentative essay about why kids should not be given participation trophies. This is one of the essays that for sure really makes you think about which side you're on. There are definitely pros' and con's to each side, leaving it up to you to have to think it through. I like the title, it gives what the essay is about and what happens because of it. The first paragraph is a perfect hypothetical situation to explain why it is unfair for everyone to be given participation trophies, when not everyone deserved it. "Even thought Johny's team played hard all season and won every game, the players got the same trophy as the kid that was out picking his nose in right field." This really gives the reader an image of how this would play out and how unfair it really is. "Bowen found that playing sports encourages kids to get better and that awards do help; however, those awards have to be earned." I appreciate this sentence because it is straightforward and about a huge main point to the essay—trophies must be earned. Great essay, their writing styles mix well and are not distinguishable. They do not get off topic or cause confusion for the reader.
TH's Causal essay covers a subject in which I know not much about, but am mildly interested in learning more about the topic. Phobias are an interesting phenomenon, and TH does a great job in tackling the topic and explaining it in a way that the reader can easily understand. In the introduction he stresses how a phobia is so much more than a fear or anxiety about something, but those suffering from a phobia "have an overpowering need to steer clear of anything which triggers their anxiety." Later on, he explains that phobias can be separated into 2 different categories, evolutionary phobias and learned phobias. He explains that evolutionary phobias "are instilled within you from very early on," while learned phobias are "that are brought on by a very negative experience with a certain stimulus."
I am complimenting AD on her classification essay, “The Vigilante, The Boy Scout, and The Newbie: Classifying Superheros”. I love how she made headings for each category and how it helped organize the essay as a whole. She used a lot of wonderful examples that really helped you classify in your head which superhero would fit where. She uses great description words in her sentences like when she says, “His seemingly make-shift rational revolved around his friends.” This description helps the readers get more information and insight on this particular character. She also inserts vocab words in effortlessly. One example is when she wrote, “The Vigilante tends to be taciturn; only talking when necessary.” My tablemate also has great ideas about how to organize her paragraphs. She didn’t just do a single paragraph for each classification, but she usually did about three or four to really get her point across and by using examples. Overall her organization and descriptors only helped her essay and made it so enjoyable to read. I recommend this essay to anyone, especially the people who love and understand superheroes.
The Essay I read is from my tablemate BD. His essay is about how violent movies do not cause violence or other bad behaviors in people. It is a very intriguing essay because it relates more to teenagers than most, which relates to me cause I am a teenager myself. His essay reflects himself which I believe is a skill every great writer needs. When people write and put a piece of their life into the story, no matter how small, the essay seems to flow and is more enticing to continue to read. He relates to youth when he wrote “ In hip hop there we see themes of emotional struggle as well as economic struggles that mirror many problems the youth are facing.” This sentence is great and allows young readers to relate to the topic. Another great sentence he wrote is “Paying attention to the song is crucial for understanding if the song is trying to glorify and make these themes popular, or whether it is trying to bring these themes to light.” This sentence is strong and gives a look into how people should approach music that may have only been looked at one way in the past.
I chose to read the essay of GB and LE. Their essay was about how the effects of technology can be very harmful to people. Their essay is quite interesting and very informative on how the use of technology can be dangerous, especially for young adults and teens. One tidbit of information that they mentioned was that "the use of technology can be linked to insomnia because of the phone...(and many more examples), throws off the melatonin production in the brain." The two have found ways to grab the attention of the reader and help to focus on anything that could happen, but most don't realize. Another great quote that I have found in their essay is: "that the amount of teenagers and young adults that have been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and other mental disorders has skyrocketed within the past twenty years." I found this information quite shocking and made me realize what effects technology has on younger generations. Overall, I thought that GB and LE wrote an informative and persuasive essay, using strong word choice and presenting it in a thought out manner.
I am complementing the essay of GE. Specifically, I am analyzing his comparison-contrast essay. All in all, I thought it did a great job comparing sweaters and sweatshirts. An important tidbit to take away from this essay is that sweaters don't have hoods and sweatshirts do. Also sweaters don't have a pocket on the front. These are some great observations but they are just the obvious things that he put in his essay. Some more intricate theories on the subject can be witnessed when he says "Although hoodies have many assets that make it seem like the right choice in every occasion, sweaters, more often than not, are overlooked, but their positive qualities can match that of an average hoodie." This quote just goes to show that he managed to take a deep look into a seemingly shallow subject. Another quote that emphasizes his take on the subject is when he says "While hoodies evince the world that you are in with the current trends, sweaters proclaim that you may have a few nuances and that you travel against the current." I love this quote because it glimpses a look into the more obscure side of the sweater/sweatshirt issue. Overall, this essay accomplishes it's goal of distinguishing the difference between sweater and sweatshirts very well and I would recommend it to anyone in need of some intellectual inspiration on the subject.
I am analysing WG’s Comparison-contrast essay. It is a wonderful piece going over the accuracy of movies in hollywood. He is comparing and contrasting how “inspired by” and “based on” a true story can mean completely different things to a movie director. The essay is quite enjoyable to read from its sarcastic and dry humour to its insightful information on the movie industry. An example of his humor can be found when analysing Titanic, “The only thing that the movie seemed to get right is that the boat sank. That is it.” With plenty of information and details jammed into every sentence, the essay is clearly knowledgeable and you can trust what you are reading. His knowledge of the movie industry shows best when he goes the different marketing strategies used by movies and how horror movies devalue the phrase “base on”. Using well crafted sentences with parallelism and near anadiplosis like, “Its majesty cannot be denied in the eyes of a movie enthusiast, but through the eyes of a historian, the movie is just a depiction” also make the essay read smoothly. Overall, the essay is a joy to read which also is informative about a fairly casual topic that many people know and enjoy.
I read through my tablemate KG’s causal essay. The topic of this essay is about the addiction of gambling and how it affects other people. The very first paragraph was what really drew me in. KG uses very vivid and descriptive words throughout. He really described the scene and made me feel as if I was in that situation. He starts the paragraph with “Congratulations!” I thought this was a great tactic used by him because I was instantly questioning what I was being congratulated for. Addiction is all around us and KG does a wonderful job explaining why they are. In his essay, some research from thefix.com really intrigued me, “If someone were to lose a close family member at a young age...they are 26 times more likely to have some sort of drug, alcohol, and/or gambling addiction in the future.” I find this particularly interesting because I lost my father at a young age and did not know that I am more likely to have an addiction that those that have not.
I will be complimenting my table partner HH’s comparison-contrast essay. I was actually debating whether or not I wanted to do my essay over the drinking age so it was a topic I am also interested in learning more about and was excited to hear her opinions about it. I found her paragraph about how consuming alcohol in moderation can be beneficial for your health. HH stated, “susceptibility to catching a cold could be decreased by 60 percent… also showed signs of being able to prevent people from contracting type 2 diabetes”. Information like this can be very persuasive when trying to prove a point because I believe everybody can agree that we want to do anything we can to improve our health and if drinking alcohol is one of those ways then that is a plus. She also wrote about how people are more likely to drink illegally if the drinking age is raised. The repercussions of this are shown in this sentence, “if these people are illegally drinking they are less likely to call a family member or cab to pick them up”. Drinking and driving is a dangerous problem and too many of these accidents include teenagers. I do believe that the drinking and driving percentage would be increased if the drinking age was too. HH showed that she was very knowledgeable about her topic and included logos, ethos and pathos making her essay irresistible to agree with.
For this specific blog task I had the pleasure to read my tablemate AD’s classification essay about the different echelons of superheros. Not only was her essay incredibly pleasurable to read, but also brought things to a different light that I had not yet thought about, such as how we can relate to the different categorizations. As someone who has an incredibly low knowledge of superheroes this could have easily been a boring essay for me. Although, AD did not disappoint, her essay was entertaining and made me want to watch some of the films to get a better understanding of the superheroes. I particularly liked in the second paragraph when she described the Vigilante as a person whose “...pain of their past pushes them to help any life form in need no matter the cost.” I also liked that AD related common people to superheroes in her conclusion paragraph by saying that “Superheroes may not always get along, but will come together when needed. And although regular people do not stop alien invasions, some fight real world battles. Everyday people volunteer to fight in wars, aid in disaster relief, and much more.” Overall this was yet another one of her excellent essays that was a joy to read.
I am writing about my temporary tablemate, FB’s, classification essay. She perfectly described and classified each of the three types of runners: Show-off, Shufflers, and Shirkers. The categories set you off on the right (or left) foot, and give you an idea of exactly what you are in for. FB does an exceptional job of including detail in her essays. “Groups of middle-aged women power walk...the occasional family with kids...one pulling a buggy filled with giggling toddlers.” This quote taken from the introduction made me feel as though I was actually people-watching in the park. In each of her paragraphs about the individual class of runner, FB adds to her essay by describing what kind of friend each type of runner might be. This observation caused me to question what type of runner/friend I might be, as well as what my friends and family might be. Overall, FB did an excellent job of composing an essay over a subject she is passionate about, as well as making it enjoyable to read!
My tablemate, TW, wrote a gorgeous classification essay. His essay caught my attention because the information he provided relates to me and I can apply it to my daily life. He classified the many different types of drivers seen on the road every day and helped me, the reader, to know how to best deal with each to avoid getting into any accidents. I found that I easily fit into what he called the “Cautious driver” category. I learned that it is important for me to continue to drive safely because although this may “frustrate other types of drivers” arriving at my destination safely is more important. I really enjoyed the repetition of a single sentence throughout his story. TW wrote near the end of almost every paragraph “If [each category would put these ideas in place when driving] the road would be safer and more enjoyable to travel on” to continue to remind the reader of this thesis statement. This was effective because it wrapped up each paragraph cleanly and used interesting literary devices to keep the reader's attention. The most interesting of the exam items he used was surprisingly the semicolon. He used it flawlessly twice in one section by saying “These drivers take it slow; these drivers like to look around; relaxation is why these drivers are out.” Overall his essay drew my interest and he clearly had a connect to his writing and was passionate about it, which made it all the more impactful.
I am complementing the well written causal essay by my tablemate LE. In her essay, she explored the reasoning behind why serial killers kill. I knew that some people killed others to get revenge, but it did not make sense to me why they would kill others after they got revenge. She explained that "they repeat this over and over giving them the power to kill them as many times as they can," which I think put something so unexplainable into a way that makes it understandable. Later LE compared the enjoyment serial killers get from murdering to the joy that drug addicts get when they abuse drugs; however, she made sure to specify that "serial killers are more focused on hurting others, while drug abusers main focus of destruction is on themselves." I like that although she compared the two, she explained that drugs harm the people who choose to abuse them, but serial killers harm and take the lives of innocent people. Serial killers intrigue me because I cannot fathom why any person would take the life of another for their own joy or benefit. LE did an exceptional job of investigating why a person would do something as devastating and extreme as what serial killers do. The research she had to back up her statements was vast and reliable, showing that she really invested time into unearthing the cause behind why serial killers commit such atrocious acts.
I am choosing to write this blog task my tablemates SH and KW’s essay about why hard work is better than toil. I chose this essay because I related to the topic. I am a firm believer that hard work will always overpower talent if talent does not work hard. I believe that without the continued hard work, talent would cease to exist. After scanning their essay, I can see that it very well written with a lot of passion and thought going into it. Two quotes from their essay that specifically stand out to me are, “The idea that things come easy is something that no person should feel, some things do come easier than others, but a feeling of self-gratification and praise comes from persistent work ethic” and “The question that needs to be asked is, how are you advancing yourself?” Both of these quotes show their knowledge and understanding of their topic and truly pull the reader into their essay. I believe that their essay is great topic to research and explain to demonstrate how working hard pays off in life.
I am analysing and complimenting my tablemate KG’s argumentative essay. The topic of this essay is about why you should go away for college. I was very interested in this essay because every student has to worry about if they either want to go to college or not. Or what college to attend. With reading this essay, it helps explain how “moving to a college forces you to be a responsible person”. I agree with that a hundred percent, because to be successful in your future you have to be responsible. Another thing mentioned in the essay that I found interesting was that “Many people think of college as a stepping stone into adulthood”. I think many people worry about attending college and moving away for college because you actually have to grow up and be independent. KG wrote this essay wonderfully, and talked about relevant topics about why people should go away for college.
I am choosing to write this blog task my tablemates SH and KW’s essay about why hard work is better than toil. I chose this essay because our class did a debate and it was super intriguing. I personally believe that talent can always over power hard work. In my personal life was faced with switching instruments as stated before in my compare and contrast essay. I believe that I could have worked as hard as I ever could, but without my natural talents I would have not made the Snareline. This essay is very well written with a lot of passion and thought going into it which is very nice. Two quotes from their essay that specifically stand out to me are, “The idea that things come easy is something that no person should feel, some things do come easier than others, but a feeling of self-gratification and praise comes from persistent work ethic” and “The question that needs to be asked is, how are you advancing yourself?” The second took me while to understand , but I feel as though it is saying that are you always counting on your talent to advance in your life.
I will be complimenting KD's causal essay regarding conflict in the Middle East. I appreciated the way she wrote in a way that was understandable but sophisticated. It was clear that she had done an immense amount of research on the topic she chose and that she had a lot of enthusiasm for the issues that she presented in her essay. When explaining the main cause for the conflict in the Middle East, KD points out the differences that the Sunnis and the Shiites possess. She explains, "The tension between the two groups has escalated so much that some have described it as a modern day holy war taking place in the Middle East." She also points out that the problems in the Middle East are not always caused by the people of the Middle East. The disarray in that part of the world can also be blamed on other countries and that it is not uncommon for "foreign countries and governments to meddle with Middle Eastern affairs." Overall, this essay was one of the more informative essays that I have read and I think that the writer did a great job at researching and explaining the cause of the conflicts in the Middle East.
My compliments go out to NM’s casual essay which was executed with precise skill. His casual essay was based on the on-going struggle of cancer and what the main causes are. Right off the bat he tells of how much of a widespread issue cancer truly is with, “600,000 people projected to die of cancer in 2017.” This simple fact really helps bring out why cancer is a big deal and makes his topic more alluring to the audience by bringing out straight statistics to back up his reasoning for the causes and relating the issue to others. NM does this by stating, “One might know of a family member or friend contracting it.” This then helps the audience relate to the topic of the essay and helps keep the flow going overall. Another factor that makes NM’s essay so unique is how he tells of the three main causes for cancer in such a simplistic way that the cure for cancer itself would seem not to far out of bounds if one were to take decisive action against it.
GB and LE
Their essay was very well written and thought out. They know how to tug at the heartstrings when the mentioned Sydney Loofe. They quoted a quote from her parent’s Facebook, which was a perfect quote because they were able to create empathy for Sydney, but also create a stronger defense on their side that they were fighting. “The amount of teenagers and young adults that have been diagnosed with anxiety, depression and other mental disorders has skyrocketed within the past twenty years”—they mentioned this in their essay which helps their defense because the studies behind this research are proof that it has risen dramatically in the last couple of years. They also said that “Of course technology is beneficial to our lives and has not just made living easier, but greatly improved most aspects of life,” which everyone can relate to on a technologically advanced level. Their essay was very good and definitely swayed my opinion of technology.
I’m going to be writing about my table mate BP. His essays are expertly written, and they show that he not only fully understands the topic but he also knows how to write an essay to fit in with the theme and requirements at hand. One sentence in his classification essay exemplifies this. “Even at practice your average Handsome will have all of their skin covered in the latest sports wear” shows to explain and give examples as to how one category can be identified in the real world (Petersen). The sentence is written to show that the particular category is completely inundated in how their appearance shows. In another instance, he writes “Nearly 4 hours later, I awoke from my deep food coma to my mother’s voice piercing my ears” (Petersen). This sentence related the feeling of being woken up after an unexpected sleep, and helps to expertly progress the narrative in his essay.
I will be complimenting JP’s essay of the classification of sports fans. I believe he did an outstanding job on classifying them in an interesting manner. Instead of just classifying each type of fan in an overused category, JP compared each type of fan to a kind of candy. Such as a Jawbreaker is the die-hard fan who sticks with his team no matter what. He describes these fans as being, “maniacs-wild, disorderly, overzealous.” There’s also the snickers bar who are the fans who bandwagon the team that is doing good that year. He describes them by saying, “You see, like a Snickers Bar melting in the sun, a bandwagon does not stay loyal to their team when times are tough.Lastly, there is skittles fans. These are fans that like multiple different teams, however they are not a bandwagon. I think that JP did a really good job on this essay as he incorporated comparing different fans to different candies. This idea was very unique and made reading his essay very enjoyable.
I will be writing about DK’s causal essay about why humans are so competitive. This essay was very well written and he went into depth and explained things thoroughly. He connected with multiple groups of people by explaining athletic sports with also video games. He describes how each group can be competitive in their own way and what makes people have that drive to win. One reason he thinks people are competitive is because “just like wolf pack leaders and alpha males, who through strength and leadership command others of their kind, humans want to show their dominance over each other too”. DK believe that human nature and wanting to show superiority over one another is one reason people have that drive to win. A big part of being human is having emotions. DK believes these emotions also push people to being more competitive. DK believes the joy of winning is one of the best feelings we receive by saying “nothing beats the joy of winning a tight game against a rival team or placing first in a national geography bee”. Having the satisfaction of going up against other people and coming out on top is one of the most exhilarating feelings we can receive.
I will be complimenting MP's casual essay. Her topic choice was excellent as it is very relevant and applicable to the lives of high school students. She did an amazing job explaining why cheating is found so often in schools and how it can be detrimental to future generations, as she says, “cheating is everywhere, and it only hurts our future.” Her essay is very informative when it comes to the thought process of kids who cheat in classrooms. Often times, it comes from being lazy, but it can also come from self-doubt. She makes a very good point when saying that kids are afraid to be wrong so they simply find alternate ways to get the right answer. Kids are not realizing that it is normal to be wrong at times, in fact, “part of the learning process is trial and error.” Overall, this essay is wonderfully written and MP clearly put a lot of research and time into this paper.
The essay I chose to examine is the one and only, JD. No, not the distraught, somewhat emo, trenchcoat-wearing psycho from Heathers, but rather Josh Donahoe. His essay, titled "Big Bucks: Positive Points of Hunting", addresses the moral implications of hunting, and why humans still partake in it despite the fact we no longer require it to survive in our modern society. I was most impressed with how Josh presented the crucial factor of the hunt being more important than the kill. For many hunters, the thrill of hunting down their prey is far more rewarding than the actual securing of the prey. This lust for outsmarting one's prey is a primordial instinct hardwired into humans. As Josh quoted from Michael Chamberlain, "When I’m matching wits against a buck I’ve chased for years, I’m matching my skills against his knowing he’ll have to make a mistake for me to have any hope of having a chance to see him." The line that really hit me the most is the last sentence of that same paragraph, where Josh states that "after all, nothing worth doing is easy." That hits deep for me. Good work so far, Josh.
I had the pleasure of reading MB's causal essay on why some people enjoy running and others dread it. I personally do not enjoy running and so it was very interesting to read about different reasons this could be. MB's essay went into specific details about different factors such as body structures and personality types that affect how much a person enjoys running. She did an amazing job at helping to explain this phenomenon, which is something I have often wondered myself. I completely agree with MB's statement when she says that "running is more of a mental sport than physical." Having multiple friends and family members that enjoy running and have even dragged me along to go on runs with them, I have noticed how much running is so much more than merely moving one foot in front of the other at a fast pace. MB speaks to this clearly and directly in her essay and uses profound imagery and relative information to help prove her points. She also makes an interesting observation with her data collection of students at our school that shows that when running is used as a punishment in a sport, it directly influences that person's outlook on running. She claims that "using running as a punishment is counterproductive. Negative associations with running are guaranteed when running is used as a punishment." I agree with this statement and learned a lot with MB's many other astonishing statements throughout the essay. Overall, MB had a wonderfully written essay that gave new insight to me that I didn't know before. Her passion for the topic was clearly shown through her excellent and ambitious word structure and vibrant techniques. It was a beautifully written paper.
I will be complimenting on my tablemate, GB’s, amazing compare-contrast essay. Right away, in the beginning, her words drew me into her essay and kept me wanting to read more. “Imagine yourself walking down the crowded streets of New York, blinded by the bright and vibrant signs, taking in the smells of various restaurants as you pas”. The use of adjectives throughout the essay fills my mind with images. With the abuse of drugs on the rise, the information given was very enlightening. “Since we live in a world where drug use has become scarily common, it has become necessary to look into what is most commonly used, what is most dangerous and what may just have a bad reputation.” this sentence flowed very well and has great grammatical structure that I wish to apply in my future essays. Overall the essay was informative, descriptive, and she showed great knowledge about the topic.
I read my table mate JL's classification essay. Right from the beginning he had a really intriguing start. There was a huge metaphor that really caught my eye. For a second it threw me off because I thought it was a metaphor but it was long so I thought it actually wasn't, but then it did turn out to be one. I loved it! The metaphor was talking about when you're bored. If you are really bored you could do a puzzle but sometimes there is a piece missing. He then related that scenario to a musical missing from an iconic band. I loved this!! It went from a little predictable to a great surprise! I also found amazingly composed sentences. "Responsibility is a major weakness of his—which is where the Monopoler comes in handy—and he can’t really be counted on to get anything done, except for advertising through social media or meetings." I thought this sentence was particularly good because not only did it use great structure and final exam terms, but it also brought back information from the previous sentence selling his case. The other sentences, The same goes for when one is putting a jigsaw puzzle together." One needs the frame, the picture, the passion, and the indifference to complete it." I loved this! It followed his intro paragraph perfectly. It also brought back that amazing metaphor that drew me into reading his paragraph. Great job JL!
The main person I will be commenting on about their essay is Andrew Erkonen. His essay was about the ethical dilemma of hunting game and if it is good or not. His essay was much better than what I expected, he was very good at working against a topic that he does not really believe in. He himself is not a firm believer in the cause that he was writing about, but he was able to make it seem as if he was. Andrew and Ty sold out when giving their points, and their vocabulary showed. It is very interesting to read what other peoples phrasing and vocabulary is like. When all you see is your own writing, it is easy to become tone deaf of sorts and not really see the beauty in writing. Reading Ty and Andrews's essay really refreshed me in writing and gave me some ideas for my own writing
I read HW's classification essay. It was a fun essay based on the five types of cross country fans out there. I choose the classification essay because many people had very interesting topics for their essays. Her essay is very well written and has wonderful flow to it. She did an amazing job explaining the differences between all the different types of fans. It is easy to tell that she put a lot of thoughts and efforts towards making this essay phenomenal. It was a fun essay about the fans of cross country and you could easily relate it to any sport. Overall, it was a very well written essay and a fun essay to read.
I found NH's classification essay very interesting. I enjoyed reading his essay very much because of how relatable it was. He classified the people of Brandon! The three different groups classified in his essay are the friends, foes, no-shows, and the unknowns. One of the best aspects of NH's essay is the distinctiveness of each group. He made it very clear and left little to no grey area. This makes it very easy for the reader and eliminates any confusion. Another thing that I really enjoyed while reading NH's essay, was all the interesting modifiers that he used. It adds great detail and makes everything sound just that much better. My favorite point in his essay is when he used a modifier to begin the paragraph while introducing the next group. I thought that it was a genius idea and really set the tone for the whole paragraph. Overall I really enjoyed reading NH's essay because it was very detailed and very relatable.
The success of BH’s Causal essay lies in the topic of the actual essay, and the flow of thinking that structures the essay. BH wrote about the nature and purpose of vulgar language used by people across languages. The essay draws on many different disciplines, including biology, psychology, and sociology to explain why people swear. Vulgar language is commonly used by many people, and it is interesting to know how many factors influences swearing. It seems a little surprising that swear words make up about only “0.7% of the vocabulary of the average English speaking person.” However, swear words can often work as more than one form of speech, making it easier for people to slip them into conversation more often. They dedicate much of their essay to the idea that swearing is not necessarily always bad because it holds its own communicative potential. For example, part of the emotional nature of swear words comes from the fact that “the speaker is willingly throwing aside any sort of care that they might be judged for using these word.” This can be a way to display trust in the listeners, thus bringing the group of communicating individuals closer. The structure of the essay also adds to the overall composition, as it builds on questions posed and then answered, which I find is a common way of thinking through questions in conversation or real life.
I chose to read IK's causal essay and oh boy was I pleased. Not only was the essay interesting enough to keep me reading but also inspired me to do a bit of researching myself! Reading this essay has allowed me to realize that I do enjoy viewing art and hope to someday be an art fanatic. All jokes aside I did truly enjoy reading this essay and to say it is successful in captivating readers would be an understatement. The composition of the essay itself is admirable because it manages to highlight and integrate every point that the writer makes with the rest. It is fair enough to say that this masterpiece is art itself! I think a writer has truly succeeded when they manage to inspire interest in the reader. As the reader, I found myself seeing some bits of information in the essay that I just had to know about more myself and as a reader, there is nothing more exciting than to dive head first into a topic that you have never even considered to be something you might enjoy! I truly think this essay is a work of are for reasons other than were mentioned in the paragraph and beautifully composed.
I will be complimenting CW’s causal essay about why poverty is still a prevalent issue in the US today. She talks about how certain society’s structural problem, the cultural idea of poverty and the ever-growing number of natural disaster help lead to the increase of poverty that we know today. It is a very welled informed view on how our society today looks at poverty as well as what we will need to do in order to make a difference. I particularly like the way that CW phrases the way people live life in Poverty. “To people in the underclass, life is lived in the moment” (3). I completely believe this and think that this is a correct to express life. She also writes about how poverty is passed down from person to person through behaviors. She says that “If a child sees their parents and grandparents with a pessimistic outlook on life, they will learn that attitude” (4). I like this I can believe in this 100 percent. Kids learn from a parents behavior so it is not far-fetched to believe that this is how the world inherits poverty. I like CW’s paper and with for her to write more.
I chose to read DK's essay on why people are so competitive. Right away I was intrigued by what he had to say because of the way he dove right into the topic without dilly-dallying which meant to me as buckle up because we've got some things to cover. This was exemplified in his thesis statement when he says, "People are competitive because they are pressured to by the capitalistic economy around them, they want to show their superiority to others, and their emotions drive them to compete." I saw this and I was like heck yes these are all such different topics and I was curious as to how he was going to pull them all together. He then went on to talk about capitalism and since I'm a sucker for some solid history I loved it. I was definitely his target audience. A sentence that stood out to me was, "Inside the mind, people subconsciously view each other under a new light, finding competition between others where none used to exist before." This got me thinking about my day to day life and how I always seek out a competition with myself or others to make things more interesting. If I feel like I don't want to do something I incentivize it so that I can win something at the end as long as it happens within a time frame or another condition. DK did a very good job of making capitalism a fascinating topic about self-awareness (at least with me).
Post a Comment